Toy Packaging - Sara Groves

 Do you need a laugh? I definitely know that I do. There are many much holier and awesome Christmas songs with great meaning. But, today... I need a laugh. So here you are!

Nothing makes me lose my cool like

Toy packaging

Ask the kids to leave the room for

Toy packaging

I have no choice the money's spent

I've worked for hours to make a dent

I guess it's anger management

Toy packaging

Nothing makes me lose my cool like

Toy packaging

Ask the kids, please, leave the room

It's time for toy packaging

I'm drawing up a battle plan

To extricate this Robot man

My self-esteem is in the can

Toy packaging

In the old days you could hold a box and shake it

Hear the pieces rattling around

My eyes tear up at these grommets, tape and twisty ties

Remembering that beautiful sound

Toy packaging

I love toy packaging

Nothing makes me lose my cool like

Toy packaging

Kids, you really need to leave the room

Mom's opening toy packaging

I'm sorry you have to see this sight

You must be brave, no, please don't cry

I promise it will be alright

I hope to have it by tonight

Never mind this dynamite

Toy packaging

I Haven't Either - Andy Gullahorn

I first heard about this song from a book someone wrote about writing and creating things (music, books, etc). He talked about how when he has gone on tour with Andy Gullahorn there is always this moment where he enjoys watching the audience as they get drawn into the song and then get sucker punched by where it lands.

It's funny, because I don't know that I get hit hard by where the song lands, I get hit by where the song starts. Because I know that is absolutely me!

Have you ever been so selfish

that you let your baby cry

While you finished up a video game?

I haven’t either

That’s pretty bad

Further, I know that I have been one of those people who isn't completely sincere on far far too many occasions. It's my goal to be honest. It's my goal to be real. But then you get into that one situation with that one group of people and... lies, performance, desire to look good - they take over.

Who am I kidding?

Who am I kidding?

I am just like them

No, I’m only kidding

Have you ever felt compelled to get a weight off of your chest

But can’t follow through because you are ashamed?

I’ve heard that you can tell the ones who truly open up

Their lives are marked with freedom and with peace

I don’t have either

No I haven’t either

A life marked with freedom and with peace. Jesus, help me to be open and honest. That I could have freedom and peace marking my life!

Have you ever been so selfish

that you let your baby cry

While you finished up a video game?

I haven’t either

That’s pretty bad

But have you ever stretched the truth

telling stories to your friends

So they’d be a little bit more amazed?

I haven’t either

I’d never do that

But there are some people out there

Who aren’t completely sincere

What they show in the daylight

Is not exactly what’s inside

It’s a form of protection

From being rejected

But you and I can be so glad

We are not like that

Have you ever made a promise 

to yourself a thousand times

Just to break it over and over again?

I haven’t either

Only people with problems do that sort of thing

But have you been so full of doubt that you

just can’t pray to God

Because you wonder if He even exists?

I haven’t either

Who am I kidding?

Who am I kidding?

I am just like them

No, I’m only kidding

Have you ever felt compelled to get a weight off of your chest

But can’t follow through because you are ashamed?

I’ve heard that you can tell the ones who truly open up

Their lives are marked with freedom and with peace

I don’t have either

No I haven’t either

Truth Be Told - Matthew West

 "I'm fine."

This single sentence is probably the biggest tell that I am lying. 

I say I’m fine, yeah I’m fine oh I’m fine, hey I’m fine but I’m not

I’m broken

Do you ever have days that you desperately want someone to ask you how you are doing - and then stick around for the gory messy answer that isn't just "I'm fine" (or it's twin sister: "I'm tired")? Do you have a person in your life who will listen to you when you say "I'm fine" and then call you out on your lies? That person is important. The person that will force you to be honest when you don't want to be.

Please don't take this as me giving every one of you permission to call me a liar if I say I am fine. I do have those people in my life. People who have earned that by walking with when I am not fine. And I think it is even healthy to have different levels of depth to friendships, levels of answers to the "how are you question" that are true - but provide levels of intimacy ("into-me-see") depending on the relationship you have. But the question is: who is that person to you? Who do you allow to see into you? Who do you choose to see into? Where do you invest in other people?

There’s a sign on the door saying “come as you are” but I doubt it

If we lived like it was true every Sunday morning pew would be crowded

What I am saying is that if we aren't honest with people we need to recognize a few things. That lack of honesty will prevent you from entering into real relationship with people. It also will affect the influence you have on others. If they think you have it all together all the time then they won't come to you when their ducks aren't even in the same pond let alone in a line...for the fourth week in a row. When you invite them to church with you, or into relationship with a loving God, they will think they aren't worthy...that they don't have it all together enough for those promises to be for them.

But the bigger issue here: if we're lying to God about how we're doing we are blocking Him out - making it so that He can't work in our lives. I am far more likely to call Him a liar when I won't accept His forgiveness or love than I am to let Him call me a liar when I tell Him I'm ok and I've got this. 

Can I really stand here unashamed

And know that you love for me won’t change

Oh God If that’s really true

Then let the Truth Be Told

Let the truth be told. His love for you won't ever change.

Lie number 1 you’re supposed to have it all together

And when they ask how you’re doing just smile and tell them “never better”

Lie number 2 everybody’s life is perfect except yours

So keep your messes and your wounds and your secrets safe with you behind closed doors

Truth be told

The truth is rarely told

I say I’m fine, yeah I’m fine oh I’m fine, hey I’m fine but I’m not

I’m broken

And when it’s out of control I say it’s under control but it’s not

And you know it

I don’t know why it’s so hard to admit it

When being honest is the only way to fix it

There’s no failure, no fall

There’s no sin you don’t already know

So let the truth be told

There’s a sign on the door saying “come as you are” but I doubt it

If we lived like it was true every Sunday morning pew would be crowded

But didn’t you say the church should look more like a hospital

A safe place for the sick and the sinner and and sick and the scarred and the prodigal

Truth be told

The truth is rarely told

Am I the only one who says...

I’m fine, yeah I’m fine oh I’m fine, hey I’m fine but I’m not

I’m broken

And when it’s out of control I say it’s under control but it’s not

And you know it

I don’t know why it’s so hard to admit it

When being honest is the only way to fix it

There’s no failure, no fall

There’s no sin you don’t already know

So let the truth be told

Can I really stand here unashamed

And know that you love for me won’t change

Oh God If that’s really true

Then let the Truth Be Told

Music by Matthew West performing Truth Be Told (Official Music Video). (C) 2020 Provident Label Group LLC, a division of Sony Music Entertainment

Heaven's Eyes - Jillian Edwards

I’m standing under the waterfall of Your approval
And I find that I don’t need anything else or anyone else but you 

When I was a kid there was nothing I wanted more than my father's approval. At the time I didn't think he approved of me, much. Turns out I was very wrong, which I learned (much) later. But. At the time what I wanted more than anything was to stand in the waterfall of approval. What I didn't know what that I was standing in the wrong waterfall. The approval that was showered on me - even in the best of days - was just a trickle compared to the waterfall of love and approval that God wanted to pour down on me.

Speak over me

Tell me again

That I’m someone you love

Let it sink in

Tell me a million times

Who I am in heaven’s eyes

Have you found that what sticks with you is the negative? That anything less than perfect feedback means that you are a failure? This is something that I deal with a lot. I can play bass for a worship service and everyone tells me "that was great" and what I remember isn't even what someone else said - it's the one wrong note that I know that I played. Sing harmony and know that I messed up on one note, and I feel like a failure.

Let the truth sink in deeper than the lies. You are someone that He loves. 

So I’m letting go

Of all other names

That I gave myself

When I heard you say

Come and find yourself in heaven’s eyes

Heaven’s eyes

What names have you given yourself? Let go of those names. Hear the truth of who He sees:

A child you chose before I took a breath

Every last detail like the back of your hand

Nobody knows, nobody knows me like you

I am always seen

I am always known

Always understood

You call me your own

We are called his own. Fully known, like the back of His hand - and yet we are called his own. Ownership that is proclaimed from the mountain tops - not sheepishly admitted to. We are His.

Where do you need to hear His truth today? Listen. Listen as He tells you a million times who you are in His eyes.

Speak over me

Tell me again

that I’m someone you love

Let it sink in

Tell me a million times

Who I am in your eyes

I’m standing under the waterfall of Your approval

And I find that I don’t need anything else or anyone else but you

Your mercy’s a song that I know by heart but I

Forget the words the moment I start to trust

Anything else or anyone else but you

Show me how to stay here, stay here, stay here

I’ll just wait here, wait here

Speak over me

Tell me again

That I’m someone you love

Let it sink in

Tell me a million times

Who I am in heaven’s eyes

So I’m letting go

Of all other names

That I gave myself

When I heard you say

Come and find yourself in heaven’s eyes

Heaven’s eyes

I wanna know

See what you see

Past all the versions and layers of me

Nobody knows, nobody knows me like you

A child you chose before I took a breath

Every last detail like the back of your hand

Nobody knows, nobody knows me like you

I am always seen

I am always known

Always understood

You call me your own

I am always seen

I am always known

Always understood

You call me your own

Speak over me

Tell me again

that I’m someone you love

Let it sink in

Tell me a million times

Who I am in your eyes

So I’m letting go

Of all other names

That I gave myself

When I heard you say

Come and find yourself in heaven’s eyes

Heaven’s eyes

Burn Out - Andrew Ascough

I'm all but gone

I knew going into this school year that burn out was going to be something I would have to actively work to avoid, and I was fairly certain it was going to come earlier than "normal" (for reference, March is a really long month... so is May... in the best of times). There's nothing normal about this school year as a teacher, or really any profession I'm told. School is just what I know. Teachers had a rough spring. And then for many of us we didn't really take a "summer break" - we went to trainings, we read blogs, we spent hours making bitmoji virtual classrooms (because they're cute, fun, give you more personality to the kids, and a stress reliever...but they're still work). Maybe we spent hours recording video to help get "ahead" before the school year started this fall. Whatever we did - many of us lost ourselves.

Ransom me from my captive, I’m all but gone

So stuck. So held hostage. The constant bings and pings and beeps that mean you have a new email. A new assignment to grade. A new parent to help. A new student with a question. And when everything is online, those bings and pings come at odd hours, and it is so easy to think that you should answer them right now because why not - the computer is here, and the student needs me. The expectation is that I help when they need help. The client comes first.

Ransom me from my captive, I’m all but gone
And I don’t know where I came from

So lost. Where did I come from? Where are you God?

Ransom me from my captive, I’m all but gone
And I don’t know where I came from
I’ve forgotten my home

As I get caught up in the negative emotions around me, the storyline of conflict, tensions, fear, the emotional climate of distrust, I find myself thirsty; I've forgotten my home. I've forgotten where the water comes from, who brings it, where to find it. I look for it on social media (newsflash: I haven't found it there), I look for it in the news. Lost, I forget where to turn to find living water.

I don’t want to fall and

I would give it all just to know You again

Oh, just to know You again

'Cause my heart burns out for You, oh

And the darkness has no hand on me now

Protected by Your blood

And called as Your own

I will find my way home

The burning yearning thirst inside me craves knowing the one who will fill that hole. The one who will ease all the tensions, gives light to my feet and my path. The one who has called me His own. He is the only one who can bring that.

Protected by Your blood

And called as Your own

You will guide me home

You will guide me home

Protected by His blood He will guide me home. 

Burn out is real. But. It's not forever. Our hearts burn out, yes, but in that we can find the reset button. Let your burn out drive you to realizing your need for Him. Rest in the protection of His blood. He will guide you home!

I don’t see You right now

And my heart is breaking down

I need to know Your mercy

Ransom me from my captive, I’m all but gone

And I don’t know where I came from

I’ve forgotten my home

Oh, I’ve forgotten my home

I don’t want to fall and

I would give it all just to know You again

Oh, just to know You again

'Cause my heart burns out for You, oh

And the darkness has no hand on me now

Protected by Your blood

And called as Your own

I will find my way home

Cure me of the shadows in which I was born

And how me what my heart is truly for

I wish nothing for myself

Oh, nothing for myself

Nothing I have could ever be more

Than You, my Creator, whom I adore

I renounce my ways

For it’s in Your refuge I’ll stay

I don’t want to fall and

I would give it all just to know You again

Oh, just to know You again

'Cause my heart burns out for You, oh

And the darkness has no hand on me now

Protected by Your blood

And called as Your own

I will find my way home

Protected by Your blood

And called as Your own

You will guide me home

You will guide me home

Testify - Wake Low

You say that nothing’s going on

That every lie is normal

Ever felt like everything you do is a lie? Like it's all a big farce? That "fake it 'til you make it" just means that you have done a lot of faking it?

Friend, I feel you! Imposter syndrome... I'm not who they think I am, and if they really knew who I was, would they still like me? Would they think I'm worth being in their life?

And you thought you knew all there was to know
Then a spirit wakes to rattle your window

We can't know all there is to know. And maybe that realization is as freeing to you as it was to me. That my job is simply to know what I do know. To testify to that.

So testify

Like a prophet with a vision

See through the world you're in

You testify

And tell the modern jury

Don’t lose the truth again

Our job is to tell our story and nobody else's. Our story of how we met Jesus. And the truth of Jesus is all that is needed to carry through. Because that is the truth. The person of Jesus Christ and what He has done in our life. Testify to that.

There’s a rending of the air

That always goes unnoticed

And fluorescence holds your stare

The wind will break your motives

When the city’s in a slumber

It’s sailing down the highway

You hear a sudden mutter

Roaring up a Sunday

So testify

Like a prophet with a vision

See through the world you're in

You testify

And tell the modern jury

Don’t lose the truth again

You say you live a simple life

As if nothing’s significant

If you just stay inside the pain will never mobilize

And when they open up their eyes

Watching every nightfall

You’re wrapped up in the sight of a thousand little white lies

And you thought you knew all there was to know

Then a spirit wakes to rattle your window

So testify

Like a prophet with a vision

See through the world you're in

You testify

And tell the modern jury

Don’t lose the truth again

You say that nothing’s going on

That every lie is normal

You said that all along it’s nothing that you did wrong

But the temple’s tearing down again

To shake around the shadows

Your heart begins to bend with the sound of every amen

Then a spirit wakes to rattle your window

So testify

Like a prophet with a vision

See through the world you're in

You testify

And tell the modern jury

Don’t lose the truth again

There’s a rending of the air

That always goes unnoticed

And fluorescence holds your stare

The wind will break your motives

When the city’s in a slumber

It’s sailing down the highway

You hear a sudden mutter

Roaring up a Sunday

So testify

Like a prophet with a vision

See through the world you're in

You testify

And tell the modern jury

Don’t lose the truth again

How Did We Get Here - Wake Low

don't close your eyes

I have days where my alarm goes off, and all I want to do is roll over and go back to sleep, sleep until 2021 or Jesus comes back. Where I just want to close my eyes to everything. Sleep feels like the right way to avoid the tension, avoid the pain. Avoid sickness, confusion, chaos, politics.

Don’t close your eyes to a tomb that’s broken wide

But here's the thing. If I do that. If I roll over and go back to sleep (figuratively or literally), in doing that, I'm also avoiding the tomb that has been broken wide. The gift that God has given.

Every moment you take is a void in a grave

Oh, it’s time to wake

Friends, it's time to wake up. It's time to put aside our differences, and to unite around the truth of an empty tomb.

So how did I get here

In a vision of embrace

I thought that I forgot, but I know this place

How did we get here? Remember that we know the place of Jesus. That the truth is Jesus. That He is the one that we cling to - that He is the one we invite people into relationship with. That it is HIM and HIM alone that brings the embrace that we need. 

And we need to wake up and share that truth with the world. 

Wherever you are - home with family, out in an essential job, serving people in a restaurant, teaching people over video call. Wherever you find yourself. That is your mission field. Wake up the the truth of an empty tomb, broken wide. Love those around you so well that they can't help but see Jesus in you. Engage in the conflict and the messiness that is building trust and raising yourself to commitment.

And while you're at it - check out this awesome new band @wakelowmusic streaming now with their first two songs wherever you get your music (and yes - that definitely means another Wake Low blog is coming)! These "youngsters" have a whole lot of wisdom and talent. I'm excited to see where their musical journey takes them!

How did we get here

It’s easy to forget

On the field that I knew lies cheap cement

How did we get here

We’re running out of time

The river was rushing, now it’s bone dry

Don’t close your eyes to a tomb that’s broken wide

Every moment you take is a void in a grave

Oh, it’s time to wake

I took the long way to George Town

There cast a winter glow

Dressed in a ballgown of paper white snow

Now the sun is an ember

Fiery colors collide

But every cinder I left behind

Don’t close your eyes to a tomb that’s broken wide

Every moment you take is a void in a grave

Oh, it’s time to wake

Edges blurred, it’s a muted word, I’m so close to seeing

Truth lies low behind the veil, this hazy view is fleeting

Is everything on Stephens’s Street an arrow to the sun

Or does this age sink to the ground, with nothing new begun

So how did I get here

In a vision of embrace

I thought that I forgot, but I know this place

Don’t close your eyes to a tomb that’s broken wide

Every moment you take is a void in a grave

Oh, it’s time to wake

Take Heart - Emu Music

Do you identify as any of these words: broken. hurting. waiting. Take heart. The King of all kings is with you, is in you, is walking beside you. And he is coming.

Broken one, take heart

For your King has entered in

Made your heart His home

When He washed away your sin

In the darkest day, know your shame is all gone

When He looks at you, God will see His Son

At the throne of grace, He says "sinner, come"

When you feel lost in shame, overwhelmed by grief, stuck in the rut. Know that He sees you - and in you He sees His son. Grief and pain are not foreign to Him - be drawn to this truth. He knows you, He loves you. 

Wait on Him. He can put even your most broken places back together again.

Do not fear the world, He has overcome

You are safe in Him covered by His love

Broken one, take heart

For your King has entered in

Made your heart His home

When He washed away your sin

In the darkest day, know your shame is all gone

When He looks at you, God will see His Son

At the throne of grace, He says "sinner, come"

Hurting one, take heart

For your King will walk beside

With each rising sun

Every grace He will provide

In the hardest day, He will never forsake

For He knows your grief and He feels your pain

When the world gives way, Jesus will remain

Waiting one, take heart

For your King will soon return

Ending every strife

He will reign upon the earth

In the longest day, know the vict'ry is won

Do not fear the world, He has overcome

You are safe in Him covered by His love

Do not fear the world, He has overcome

You are safe in Him covered by His love

Source: Musixmatch

Into the Sea (It's Gonna Be OK) - Tasha Layton

What questions keep you up at night? When you find yourself doubting, where do those doubts come from? What do you internalize and find yourself stuck on, what lies get under your skin, what breaks you?

Strangely, one of the fastest ways to break me is to tell my your story of pain. Hearing other people share from their broken places is one of the greatest gifts; others stories of pain, of shame, or of how they have been hurt by their own actions or things someone has said to them is the fastest way to bring me to tears. It's also the fastest way to leave me up at night. When people who I love have been hurt in a way that seems unimaginable I find myself questioning if God is still good. (why my own pain doesn't trigger this is probably a blog for another day)

Can you make something

From the wreckage?

Would you take this heart

And make it whole again?

I don't know how many times you have found yourself wondering if there is any way to salvage a broken mess. Whether that is a kitchen experiment (ask me about making gnocchi... what a disaster) that went wrong, a sewing adventure that ended up 3 sizes too small, or a life that feels left in pieces, like Humpty Dumpty who has fallen from the wall - what do you do with those questions? Where do you turn?

Though the mountains may be moved into the sea

Though the ground beneath might crumble and give way

I can hear my Father singing over me

"It's gonna be okay, it's gonna be okay"

In the quiet do you hear the words being sung over you? It's going to be ok. Friends, it's going to be ok.

Where do you need to be reminded of this truth? Where do you need to hear that God is close? Maybe you're in that low place for just this moment. Can you hear his voice? He is close...

The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed. - Psalm 34:18

My heart is breaking

In a way I never thought it could

My mind is racing

With the question, "Are you still good?"

Can you make something

From the wreckage?

Would you take this heart

And make it whole again?

Though the mountains may be moved into the sea

Though the ground beneath might crumble and give way

I can hear my Father singing over me

"It's gonna be okay, it's gonna be okay"

I've blamed myself

And if I'm honest, maybe I've blamed you too

But You would not forsake me

'Cause only good things come from You

Though the mountains may be moved into the sea

Though the ground beneath might crumble and give way

I can hear my Father singing over me

"It's gonna be okay, it's gonna be okay"

From beginning to the end

You're so close

You have never let me down

And you won't

In the valley, in the shadow, I know

You're so close

You're so close

Though the mountains may be moved into the sea

Though the ground beneath might crumble and give way

I can hear my Father singing over me

"It's gonna be okay"

"It's gonna be okay"

"It's gonna be okay"

"It's gonna be okay"

I'm gonna be okay

I'm gonna be okay

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Keith Smith / Bryan Fowler / Micah Kuiper

Into the Sea (It's Gonna Be Ok) lyrics © So Essential Tunes

Where You Are - Leeland

Have you ever been really thirsty? Like it's 100 degrees out and you've been working in the sun all day with no water kinda parched? I can honestly say I haven't ever been that thirsty. And I definitely count that as a blessing. As someone who gets heat sick really easily, and dehydrated even easier, I've spent a lot of time lying in dark rooms with a cold washcloth over my eyes nursing serious headaches, and that's enough of that for me.

But I wonder...

Have I ever been that thirsty...for God? Do I take care of my need for Jesus in my life like I take care of my need for water? I carry a water bottle pretty much everywhere I go. Do I remember to take Jesus with me? Or, does it take a spiritual migraine for God to get my attention?

I can't get enough
No I can't get enough
Of Your amazing love
I can't get enough

And then I wonder. Do I feel the thirst? Before it gets to unparalleled levels, do I recognize the need for more? Do I run back to the water that God provides, His amazing love?

And I just wanna be where You are
I just wanna be near Your heart
There is nothing like Your love
There is nothing like Your love

Jesus that is my prayer tonight - that I would want to be where you are. That I would recognize Your love, recognize my thirst for your love before the migraine sets in. 

Jesus I love You

I can't get enough
No I can't get enough
Of Your amazing love
I can't get enough

I can't walk away
No I can't walk away
From where I've seen Your face
And I can't walk away

And I just wanna be where You are
I just wanna be near Your heart
There is nothing like Your love
There is nothing like Your love

Jesus I love You

With all the angels singing
Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy
Jesus I love You

Source: Musixmatch

Faithful God - I AM THEY

What do you think of when you hear the phrase "I am surrounded"? Is it positive? Or negative? Do you think of being surrounded by enemies? For sure when I hear the words I definitely bring up all kinds of negative images.

I am surrounded  

On every side, can’t see the light of day  

But what if... what if... 

What if we thought of it in the Hebrews 12 way? Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. - Hebrews 12:1

But I am persuaded 

Beyond all hope, You won’t let go of me 

I stake my claim  

On every word You say 

You will not be late  

What if instead of feeling surrounded by our enemies we realize that stronger than those foe, closer to us, we are surrounded by a crown of witnesses to the life of faith, people to remind us of the truth. Who reminds you of the truth? Do you hold them close? Surround yourself with them? Do you stake your claim on the every word He says? Knowing that He will not be late?

I will sing through fire and thunder 

Cause You are on my side 

I trust You with my life 

I know my story, it isn’t over 

Even against all odds 

You are a faithful God 

That’s who You are 

You are a faithful God 

What do you do in the midst of the fire and storm? Do you sing of God's faithful love? Because friends, He is faithful.

The darkest of weather 

Though I can’t see, I still believe You’re good  So I’m moving forward  

Through crashing waves, I know I’m safe with You 

You hold my life  

You hear my cry  

With every breath inside 

Today has been a dark weather day for me. A friend of mine I haven't talked to in a while (not a close friend, but someone who I do count as a friend, someone who has been their for me over the last few years) messaged me that a close friend/coworker of hers had died, and that she herself was just diagnosed with cancer. I hurt so much for my friend. And honestly, I can't see God in that. But, even though I can't see it, I do still believe that He is good. And I know she does, too. And I truly believe that as I cry out to God he hears my cry, every breath of it. 

I am convinced  

That Your promises will hold together 

And I will dwell 

In the hope of Your love forever

God help me dwell in your hope forever!

I am surrounded  

On every side, can’t see the light of day  

But I am persuaded 

Beyond all hope, You won’t let go of me 

I stake my claim  

On every word You say 

You will not be late  

I will sing through fire and thunder 

Cause You are on my side 

I trust You with my life 

I know my story, it isn’t over 

Even against all odds 

You are a faithful God 

That’s who You are 

You are a faithful God 

The darkest of weather 

Though I can’t see, I still believe You’re good  So I’m moving forward  

Through crashing waves, I know I’m safe with You 

You hold my life  

You hear my cry  

With every breath inside 

I am convinced  

That Your promises will hold together 

And I will dwell 

In the hope of Your love forever

(Matthew Hein, Abbie Parker, Colby Wedgeworth)

© 2020 I Am They Publishing / Be Essential Songs (BMI) (admin. at EssentialMusicPublishing.com); IAMTHEYSONGS / All Essential Music (ASCAP) (admin. at EssentialMusicPublishing.com); Capitol CMG Genesis / Colby Wedgeworth Designee (ASCAP) (admin. at CapitolCMGPublishing.com)

(C) 2020 Provident Label Group LLC, a division of Sony Music Entertainment

Death In Reverse - John Mark McMillan (feat. Sarah McMillan)

I've tried to start this blog about a dozen times. I've listened to the song a million times now. Every time I have an intense emotional reaction. But I can't figure out how to write about it. The words sit there spilling out of my eyes and not my fingers. I'm writing this on my phone because I think I finally connected the thoughts swirling in my head and don't want to lose it. Please forgive any typos.

Have you ever thought how we make our plans for our life. The 1 year, 2 year, 5 year goals? The place we think we'll be? And then we think somehow because we made those goals and they might be good and godly goals, inspired by God, but we think then we have some claim to them. Like we should be definitely headed there. What do you do when you aren't headed on that path?

You unearth me like a vein of gold

With the powers that drive up the flowers from the fold

You cast me, uncursed, unearth my body and my soul

Like fire from my ashes, like fire from my coals

Have you ever found yourself then worrying about those goals? Worrying about how you're going to get there. Worrying about how you could possibly do the thing you set out to do? Who you think you are, who you are meant to be? 

And I build my life around

Someone who I thought that I was

But it turns out

All the things I do to feel young

They only make me old

Or maybe on that path you feel like you got derailed? Or like you are chosing the very opposite of what would get you there? In Matthew, Jesus is hanging on the cross and people are taunting him. "The people passing by shouted abuse, shaking their heads in mockery. “Look at you now!” they yelled at him. “You said you were going to destroy the Temple and rebuild it in three days. Well then, if you are the Son of God, save yourself and come down from the cross!” The leading priests, the teachers of religious law, and the elders also mocked Jesus. “He saved others,” they scoffed, “but he can’t save himself! So he is the King of Israel, is he? Let him come down from the cross right now, and we will believe in him! He trusted God, so let God rescue him now if he wants him! For he said, ‘I am the Son of God.’”" (Matthew 27:39‭-‬43 NLT) What do you do when you feel like your goals are shattered? Do you react to the taunts, give in to the temptations? Do you find yourself taunting others in your pain? 

But you raise me

Like a baby

Like a fiery Phoenix bird

Oh, and you lift me up

Like Lazarus

And love me like death in reverse

Friends, in the middle of the pile of ash that your goals may feel like, the person you thought you were, the person you are feeling yourself become, God is there. Raising you up. Like a baby he lifts you up out of your shame and pain. He takes the taunts. So that He can give you new life. So He can love you like death in reverse.

Be encouraged today. May you find yourself loved in God's reverse way.

You descend upon me like a rolling stone

Like black swan raging on for all that I know

You know it unnerves me when I lose control, and I'm

All out of options and I'm out of my head

Then I build my life around

Someone who I thought that I was

But it turns out

All the things I do to feel young

They only make me old

But you raise me

Like a baby

Like a fiery Phoenix bird

Oh, and you lift me up

Like Lazarus

And love me like death in reverse

You unearth me like a vein of gold

With the powers that drive up the flowers from the fold

You cast me, uncursed, unearth my body and my soul

Like fire from my ashes, like fire from my coals

And I build my life around

Someone who I thought that I was

But it turns out

All the things I do to feel young

They only make me old

But you raise me

Like a baby

Like a fiery Phoenix bird

Oh, and you lift me up

Like Lazarus

And love me like death

You love me like death

You love me like death in reverse

And all my life I've been

Fighting for a place I could thrive

But it turns out

All the things I do to survive

They only make me old

But you raise me

Like a baby

Like a fiery Phoenix bird

Oh, and you lift me up

Like Lazarus

And love me like death

You love me like death

You love me like death in reverse

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: John Mark Mcmillan

Death In Reverse lyrics © Meaux Jeaux Music, Raucous Ruckus Publishing

Honesty - Jason Gray

I don't know how many times over the last 30 years that I have been on this path called following Christ this refrain has been my cry. "If you're the healer, why are my wounds still open?" But, what I do know is that it is more than I can count on my fingers...and my toes...together. Are you sure you want me, God? I have nothing to bring but doubt and anger. Is that what you want from me?

I gave You my heart

So, tell me, why is it broken?

If You're the healer

Why are my wounds still open?

What do You want from me?

Are You sure You want everything?

Even my honesty?

I think it is really easy to fall into the trap that God only wants us when we are "useful" to Him. That we should only ever talk to God in a positive, joyful and upbeat way. That he wants us to only bring him perfect submission, even when it is fake. Can I tell you, friends, that as a ministry leader/worship leader/pastor's wife this feels even more true? The line from Frozen "conceal don't feel" sometimes feels like it applies. 

I'm sorry if this comes out wrong

I'm afraid I shouldn't talk with you this way

But I hope you hear my heart that hurts

Buried in the angry words I say

I told you leave but please don't go

I'm in so deep, and I don't know

What's goin' on

One of the lessons that I have had to learn (many times, the hard way) is that God actually wants our honesty. He'd rather fight with us than be given the silent treatment. And He doesn't roll His eyes at us when we come back with the same struggles in a different way. Or even in the same way. At this point in my life I have a few really good friends, who I know want me to be real. Who I know that when I share my hurts they won't leave me alone, even if I tell them to go away. I've learned that my ministry is actually stronger when I am open. When I am vulnerable. When I share with others the pain and hurt that I have been through. When I am open to struggles as I am walking through them.

And we have found a space, a church family, where that is allowed. Where people want to be real. Because only through being real and vulnerable do you create actual community. Secrets lose power when they are stated out loud. Real, true, enduring community is built through being real and vulnerable and serving God together. Even when it hurts... in singing "Hallelujah, I'm going through hell..." but continuing to sing.

And I gotta tell you - this social distancing thing is the pits. I miss my family. I miss my friends. I miss the friends I call family. I miss the closeness. But in the last 48 hours I have found conversation with multiple people about the real stuff going on in their lives. I have found community in ways I had allowed myself to forget existed. I have found honesty. And vulnerability. And healing.

Hallelujah, hallelujah

Hallelujah, I'm goin' through hell

Hallelujah, hallelujah

I'm still singing

Keep singing friends. Reach out to someone. Be real and vulnerable. Allow yourself to cry out to Jesus in the midst of the hell. Know that God would rather fight with you than not talk.

If I told You I still trusted You

I'd honestly be lying through my teeth

But it's funny how it's always You

I'm talkin' to when I say I don't believe

I tell You leave, but You won't go

I'm in so deep, and I don't know

What's goin' on

I gave You my heart

So, tell me, why is it broken?

If You're the healer

Why are my wounds still open?

What do You want from me?

Are You sure You want everything?

Even my honesty?

I'm sorry if this comes out wrong

I'm afraid I shouldn't talk with you this way

But I hope you hear my heart that hurts

Buried in the angry words I say

I told you leave but please don't go

I'm in so deep, and I don't know

What's goin' on

I gave You my heart

So, tell me, why is it broken?

If You're the healer

Why are my wounds still open?

What do You want from me?

Are You sure You want everything?

Even my honesty?

Even my honesty?

Even my honesty?

Hallelujah, hallelujah

Hallelujah, I'm goin' through hell

Hallelujah, hallelujah

I'm still singing and that's is well

Hallelujah, hallelujah

Hallelujah, I'm goin' through hell

Hallelujah, hallelujah

I'm still singing

I know You've promised that You won't leave me broken

But right now I need to know You're here in this moment

Why won't You answer me? (Answer me)

What do You want from me?

When all I can bring You is my doubt and my anger

You'd still rather fight with me than let us be strangers

Is that what You want from me? (Want from me)

The way You get close to me

Are You sure You want all of me?

All of my agony?

All of my questioning?

Even my honesty?

Even my honesty

Even my honesty

Hallelujah, hallelujah

Hallelujah, I'm goin' through hell

Hallelujah, hallelujah

I'm still singing

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Jason Gray / Benji Cowart / Bryan Fowler

Honesty lyrics © Word Music Llc, Howiecowie Publishing

Breathe - C3 Music

It's been a few weeks. If I'm honest, that's not a lack of thought. Each Wednesday that has come and gone I have thought "I should write a blog post today" - and then shuddered. Not because I have horrible things or painful things or even nothing to say, but because I have found myself overwhelmed by grief. Not the grief from losing a loved one, but rather a grief caused by the pain and hurt I am seeing around me. The division. And I haven't known how to appropriately address that. How to be honest and real with you, my readers, over something that I don't completely understand and certainly do not know how to solve.

I try really hard to not complain about things I'm not willing to change. Complaining about something when you don't have a better idea for how something could be handled, or you aren't willing to do the hard work to change and try something different is not fair. When I am willing to do something different to make something better, when I have ideas for good solutions to a problem, that's what I like to address.

And where we're at right now, I can't do that. I can't solve problems for my friend who currently is sicker than she's ever been in her life with Covid, who is watching her father suffer (far worse) with it as well. I can't make my friend who feels like all of her rights are being stripped away feel confident in her place, in her rights. I can't provide the smiles and hugs another friend needs right now. I can't take care of hurting and broken friends. I can't solve the fear of death because of her race, her children's race, that is ripping apart a friend, soothe her fears for her children. I can't negate the fear of a friend who is terrified for police officers lives. I can't ease the pain of the friend who feels like her love and pride for our country is causing her to be called a racist...

I get lost in the I can'ts.

And it is easy for me to forget the I can that Jesus brings. 

In this place You're welcome

Draw ever close to me

I'm longing for your presence

God my peace

Water in the desert

Fire in the night

Speak into these dry bones

I found myself today telling someone I just want Jesus to come now. To fix it all. He reminded me of a verse in second Peter: "The Lord isn't really being slow about his promise, as some people think. No, he is being patient for your sake. He does not want anyone to be destroyed, but wants everyone to repent." (2 Peter 3:9) My impatience gives way to god's patience: His desire to see everyone united with Him. In reading on Peter says "Since everything around us is going to be destroyed like this, what holy and godly lives you should live, looking forward to the day of God and hurrying it along...and so, dear friends, while you are waiting for these things to happen, make every effort to be found living peaceful lives that are pure and blameless in his sight." (2 Peter 3:11-12a, 14) 

Holy Spirit breathe

Breathe new life in me

Come in awesome power

Awaken me

Burn like a fire in me

Give strength unto my feet

You lift my eyes to see Him

Jesus Christ my king

What are you doing, friend, to live a peaceful pure and blameless life, to spread God's love to those around you who need it so desperately. To hurry along the day of the Lord? The bring the new heaven and earth that we have been promised? Are we waiting patiently, expectantly, hurrying along that day? Or are we sitting, griping, stressing, worrying, trying to do things on our own, upset that God hasn't fixed it all yet?

Overtake me

Captivate me

Lead me

Come like a river, come like a flood, let us be overwhelmed baptized in your love.

Jesus, may my life reflect all that you are. May I be so full of peace, with a fire of your love burning bright within me, your strength in me, ever lifting my eyes to see You - the only true king.

Holy Spirit Breathe.

In this place You're welcome

Draw ever close to me

I'm longing for your presence

God my peace

Water in the desert

Fire in the night

Speak into these dry bones

Holy Spirit breathe

Breathe new life in me

Come in awesome power

Awaken me

Burn like a fire in me

Give strength unto my feet

You lift my eyes to see Him

Jesus Christ my king

The veil lifted from me

My eyes begin to see

The host of heavens armies

Stand with me

With you I won't be beaten

You lead my victories

You fill me with Your power

Holy Spirit breathe

Breathe new life in me

Come in awesome power

Awaken me

Burn like a fire in me

Give strength unto my feet

You lift my eyes to see Him

Jesus Christ my king

Come Like a river

Come like a flood

Let us be overwhelmed

Baptized in Your love

Life giving water

Come fill my soul

Overtake me

Captivate me

Lead Me

Come Like a river

Come like a flood

Let us be overwhelmed

Baptized in Your love

Life giving water

Come fill my soul

Overtake me

Captivate me

Lead Me

Holy Spirit breathe

Breathe new life in me

Come in awesome power

Awaken me

Burn like a fire in me

Give strength unto my feet

You lift my eyes to see Him

Jesus Christ my king

Holy Spirit breathe

Breathe new life in me

Come in awesome power

Awaken me

Burn like a fire in me

Give strength unto my feet

You lift my eyes to see Him

Jesus Christ my king

Holy Spirit Breathe

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Charlotte Exton

Every Table is an Altar - Jason Upton

Communion. Defined as the sharing or exchanging of intimate thoughts and feelings, especially when the exchange is on a mental or spiritual level1. I've heard it broken up as "Come Union"... come be with someone. A union is a joining of two things together. We talk about the marriage union, the union of states. Unity. A uniting of things together for a common purpose, to create a single entity. 

Every table is an altar

Every breath is a gift from You

Every moment is a treasure

Every day is a kiss from You

In light of the context of communion - the coming together of the church to create unity with God, through the sacrifice of Jesus - what does it mean to view every table as an altar? That every breath, every moment, every day is a gift, a treasure, a kiss from God. Do we want that kind of vulnerability and intimacy with God? Do we seek that kind of unity with Him? 

Our World feels very separated right now. Unity seems so far from possible. Like something that we would grasp at but never quite grab. It is easy to get dragged into social media discussions that feel so far from people seeking unity. 

Every stranger has a story

Every story's being told by You

We're all children on a journey

Jesus, only You can lead us through

What if  we let Jesus tell our story? Tell other people's stories? What if we focused on our union with Jesus above all else. Viewed every table as an altar - a place to come before God and seek unity and intimacy with God. If we all did that, maybe then we could find true union with each other - through our unity in Christ.

Break the bread, pour the wine

Let our hearts, come alive

In Your presence, in Your presence

Let our fear, fall away

Let our faith, rise today

In Your presence, in Your presence

Jesus, Jesus

When we join in that intimacy with God, when we stand together, letting fear fall away - then we will be able to unite in communion with God and each other to truly worship Him.

We will shout Your name, King of glory

We will stand and sing, You are holy

We will pour out praise, You are worthy

Of our lives, now and forever

Let our hearts be awake, God. Let us hear and see and join together with you. Awaken me to your voice, your kiss, your gift.

Every table is an altar

Every breath is a gift from You

Every moment is a treasure

Every day is a kiss from You

Every table is an altar

Every breath is a gift from You

Every moment is a treasure

Every day is a kiss from You

So let our hearts

Be awake, be awake

Let our hearts

Be awake, be awake

Break the bread, pour the wine

Let our hearts, come alive

In Your presence, in Your presence

Let our fear, fall away

Let our faith, rise today

In Your presence, in Your presence

Jesus, Jesus

Every stranger has a story

Every story's being told by You

We're all children on a journey

Jesus, only You can lead us through

This is our prayer tonight…

So let our hearts

Be awake, be awake

Oh, Let our hearts

Be awake, be awake

Oh, break the bread, pour the wine

Let our hearts, come alive

In Your presence, in Your presence

Let our fear, fall away

Let our faith, rise today

In Your presence, in Your presence

Jesus, oh-oh-oh-ohh, ohhhh

Jesus, oh-oh-oh-ohh, ohhhh

Jesus, Jesus

We will shout Your name, King of glory

We will stand and sing, You are holy

We will pour out praise, You are worthy

Of our lives, now and forever

We will shout Your name, King of glory

We will stand and sing, You are holy

We will pour out praise, You are worthy

Of our lives, now and forever

We will shout Your name, King of glory

We will stand and sing, You are holy

We will pour out praise, You are worthy

Of our lives, now and forever

Let our hearts

Be awake, be awake

So let our hearts

Be awake, be awake

That's our prayer

Let our hearts

Be awake, be awake

Let our hearts

Be awake, be awake

Break the bread tonight…

Break the bread, pour the wine

Let our hearts, come alive

In Your presence, in Your presence

Let our fear, fall away

Let our faith, rise today

In Your presence, in Your presence

Oh Lord, we will shout Your name

We will shout Your name, King of glory

We will stand and sing, You are holy

We will pour out praise, You are worthy

Of our lives, now and forever

Of our lives, now and forever

Of our lives, now and forever

Break the bread, pour the wine

Let our hearts, come alive

In Your presence, in Your presence

Let our fear, fall away

Let our faith, rise today

In Your presence, in Your presence

Jesus, Jesus

Oh, let our fear fall away tonight

Let our fear be replaced with Your love tonight

Oh, let our fear fall away, fall away, fall away, in Your love

Oh, let our fear fall away, fall away, fall away, in Your love tonight

Let our fear fall away, fall away, fall away, in Your love tonight

Oh God

We break the bread, pour the wine

Let our hearts, come alive

In Your presence, in Your presence

So let our fear, fall away

Let our faith, rise today

In Your presence, in Your presence

So, break the bread, the wine

Oh, break the bread, pour the wine

Let our hearts, come alive

In Your presence, in Your presence

So let our fear, fall away

Let our faith, rise today

In Your presence, in Your presence

Jesus

Every stranger has a story

Every story's being told by You

We're all children on a journey

Jesus, only You can lead us through

Jesus, only You can lead us through

Jesus, only You can lead us through

Over All I Know - Vertical Worship

I'm having one of those days. You know the type. The days where you are just that aware of how little you know. Of how desperately you need Jesus. Where you are reminded that you are weak. 

It's not like any one specific thing has happened today. Today's actually been a pretty "good" day. I got to shed some past insight on how something was done, and speak into the future of that project - that it could go in a different direction completely if people want it to. The kids are pretty much getting along, in a way that makes me remember how very blessed I am. People have been emailing and texting very nice, supportive, prayerful things. I got my grades posted, correctly, before they were due. I feel like I am doing compassionate things to help kids have "no harm done" after this wacky wacky trimester. And yet...

Yet...

There is still this niggling naggling feeling. The reminder that on my own I am nothing. The reminder that without Jesus it could all come crashing down. That HE is the one that calms the storms. That HE is the one who controls sickness. That HE is the one who tells fear it has no place, it can't win.

And while that feeling can sometimes feel a lot like unease, what a freeing reminder that can be!

You are the one above it all

I stand in awe, 

You're the God over all I know

Guess what friends? We don't have to know it all!! We don't have to be the solution to everything. He already is. Lean in and listen. Believe it. Stand in awe. And listen.

You tell mountains they must fall and they fall

You tell oceans to be still and they're calm

You tell sickness it must leave and it's gone

In my weakness God I know You are strong

You are the One above it all, I stand in awe

You're the God over all I know

No higher name, no greater throne, You stand alone

You're the God over all I know

Over all I know

You tell broken things be healed and they're whole

You tell fear it has no place it must go

You tell death it has no chance, it won't win

And if You are for me, God, what can come against?

You are the One above it all, I stand in awe

You're the God over all I know

No higher name, no greater throne, You stand alone

You're the God over all I know

You are the One above it all, I stand in awe

You're the God over all I know

No higher name, no greater throne, You stand alone

You're the God over all I know

I believe it Lord, I have seen it

I believe it, I have seen it, My God is over all

I believe it, I have seen it, My God is over all, oh yes, yes

I believe it, I have seen it, My God is over all

I believe it, I have seen it, My God is over all

You are, You are the One above it all, I stand in awe

You're the God over all I know

No higher name, no greater throne, You stand alone

You're the God over all I know

You are the One above it all, I stand in awe

You're the God over all I know

No higher name, no greater throne, You stand alone

You're the God over all I know

Over all

You're over all

That I know

You're in control

I believe it, I receive it, My God is over all, oh yes he is

I believe it, I receive it, My God is over all

And I believe it, I receive it, My God is over all

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Jess Cates / Jason Ingram / Andi Rozier

Over All I Know lyrics © So Essential Tunes, All Essential Music

Original Recording:

Where's Your Goodness - Wendy Droke

Over a year ago Josh spoke on Good Friday this message. It was a message he had written before the service, and in getting ready to lead the worship for that service, I spent a lot of time with the written out message notes for the service. Somewhere in there I started writing this song. Much of the words from this song come from that message - about grieving well. I wrote the song, made a rough recording so I wouldn't forget it, and then it sort of went into the "someday maybe I'll finish it" pile.

But this week I pulled it back out, as I wrestled with grief. As I wrestle with senseless death. As I wrestle with things not being what I thought they would be. As I struggle through searching for the truth. As I lie awake, in the middle of the night, hope lost, feeling like the sun won't rise. When darkness wins and the walls cave in. What do we hold on tight to?

That His goodness feels better in the hard times, His light shines brighter in the darkness.

As Josh says, "fast forwarding cheats us from the lessons that God wants to teach us in the darkness." Give his podcast a listen (http://www.easthillsalliance.org/podcast/2019/4/20/good-friday-meditation-pastor-josh-droke) and then listen to this song. Maybe it can help you find some peace in the darkness.

Friends, don't run away from grief. Lean in, process it. Grieve the things you have lost, the dreams that aren't as you thought they would be. And then look for the light shining in the darkness.

Senseless death, innocent life lost

Enough's Enough

Where's your goodness and light

Sweep aside the signs of grief and loss

Just be tough

Where's your goodness and light

Good faith, no room for doubt or hurt

Don't show the pain

Where's your goodness and light?

Your goodness feels better in the hard times

Your light shines brighter in the darkness

Your goodness feels better in the hard times

Your light shines brighter in the darkness

The same Lord, who wept for Lazarus

He weeps with you

There's Your goodness and light

The same God who thundered at His death

He waits with you

There's Your goodness and light

The same Christ, went to His end for you

Holds you, at your end

There's Your goodness and light

Your goodness feels better in the hard times

Your light shines brighter in the darkness

Your goodness feels better in the hard times

Your light shines brighter in the darkness

When I lie awake in the middle of the night

My hope is lost and the sun won't rise

The darkness wins and the walls cave in

I will hold on tight.

To Your goodness that feels better in the hard times

To Your light that shines brighter in the darkness

Your goodness feels better in the hard times

Your light shines brighter in the darkness

In the Hands of the Potter - Casting Crowns

Are we shape-able?

I don't know a ton about ceramics and the art of making awesome clay things. When I was young, in an effort to keep me from summer boredom I think, my parents signed me up for a couple of pottery classes. They were a lot of fun, although I was honestly terrible at it. What I envisioned in my head rarely became a reality. But I do remember some of the basics.

Clay is an amazing material. Too wet, it becomes slippery, it won't hold its shape, it's not sturdy. Any adjustment causes the pottery you were making to completely lose its form. Too dry and it becomes brittle, breaking easily. Adjustments are no longer possible if you want to keep the pot whole. At either end of the spectrum it can't be formed into something new, either because it won't bend that way, or because it won't stay that way. 

And this morning it got me thinking... where am I on that spectrum? Am I so fluid that when someone pushes on me I flop over? Am I too rigid, to where I can't be reshaped or reformed? I find in my life that I hesitate to engage with people on either end of this spectrum. People who will not push back, won't stay true to their own convictions, who will simply cave to whatever pushes on them are difficult to talk to, for fear of something you say causing them to swing too far. People who are so firm that there is no room for conversation are difficult to talk to, for fear of hitting up against something that will cause them to shut down, or break. 

So how are you doing in the area of spiritual water saturation? Are you diluted to the point of slopping every where when God tries to make a course correction? Are you so dry that you will break if God asks something of you? 

I'm all alone with my questions, I'm dry and cracked open, and I thirst for You

I remember a conversation with our ceramics teacher at school. What do you do with the dried out clay? Is it garbage? No, she said. Break it up, soak it in water, and it will turn back into clay that can be used. I know from experience that the same is true with wet clay. Let it sit and it will eventually dry out enough to be usable. 

Where are you on this spectrum? In the Hands of the Potter, how useful are you? Do you need to be left in the sun (Son?) to dry out, to remove some of the water of the world, so that God can shape and use you to make a beautiful creation useful to Him? Or, do you need to be broken up, have some Holy water poured over you, and be worked until you are ready to be shaped? 

Friends, both of these are painful processes. But, the other side will be so worth it. Lord, make me shape-able by your master Hands. When my world is breaking me, Your love is shaping me, and now the enemy is afraid of what You're making me.

And as I fall apart

Come flood this desert heart

Fall like the rain, Living Water

And I know Your way is best

Lord, help me find my rest

And I'll be the clay

In the Hands of the Potter

I still remember when I heard You call me by name

I'd follow You anywhere, knew I could trust You in anything

But now sorrow beats down on me, waiting for You to come through

I'm all alone with my questions, I'm dry and cracked open

And I thirst for You

And as I fall apart

Come flood this desert heart

Fall like the rain, Living Water

And I know Your way is best

Lord, help me find my rest

And I'll be the clay

In the Hands of the Potter

My world is spinning, my life seems so out of control

Nailed, scarred hands tell the story of love that will never let go of me

Through the sunshine or rain, I know where my hope is found

What You started in me, I know You will complete from the inside out

And as I fall apart

Come flood this desert heart

Fall like the rain, Living Water

And I know Your way is best

Lord, help me find my rest

And I'll be the clay

In the Hands of the Potter

My world is breaking me, Your love is shaping me

And now the enemy is afraid of what You're making me

When my world is breaking me, Your love is shaping me

And now the enemy is afraid of what You're making me

My world is breaking me, Your love is shaping me

And now the enemy is afraid of what You're making me

And as I fall apart

Come flood this desert heart

Fall like the rain, Living Water

And I know Your way is best

Lord, help me find my rest

And I'll be the clay

In the Hands of the Potter

And I'll be the clay

In the Hands of the Potter

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Mark Hall / Jonathan Smith

In the Hands of the Potter lyrics © Essential Music Publishing

Furthest I Can Fall - Bridge Worship

Unknown. Ever changing. Transition. "I know I told you___, but ____."

Anybody else sick of these words?

Whatever the last two and a half months has looked like for you, I would imagine that these are words you have heard, too often. I would imagine that the you that was living your life 6 months ago couldn't have even begun to imagine what life looks like today. Change and unknown is so hard. Even people who love change generally do not thrive on unknowns, and constantly fluctuating truth. Things that people thought were certain and true one minute can change, quickly.

And all of that brings lots of emotions. Big emotions. Anger, fear, passion, offense, rejection... the intense reactions we have when we are in a place of feeling unbalanced, alone, out of whack and routines. And grief. Oh the grief. That pops up at weird times, that leads to blind spots, that leads to desperate reactions. That feeds those emotions, outside of our knowledge or control.

Friends, I don't know what the future holds. I don't know what the truth about all the virus information is. I've fallen down that rabbit hole too many times in too many different places. I've found myself feeling lost, angry, afraid, rejected. But here's the truth I do know:

I know the furthest I can fall is in His hands.

Who am I, forgiven?

Now my name is written

On the hands, that were pierced up on the cross

To save me

To save me

Whatever the coming days, weeks and months look like. Whatever decisions are made for me, decisions that may leave me feeling unsettled, feeling rejected, feeling like I am not enough. I am forgiven. My name is written on the hands of the One that was pierced up on the cross to save me.

Who can stand to condemn me now?

What can shake this solid ground?

The work is done

I put my trust in the Son of Man

Now the furthest I can fall is in His hands

Whether that feels like you have fallen a short distance or a long distance, friends - His hands are there, waiting for you. With your name written on them. Put your trust in Him.

Who am I, unworthy?

To a God so Holy

You seen my heart but still

You gave Your son to save me

To save me

Who can stand to condemn me now?

What can shake this solid ground?

The work is done

I put my trust in the Son of Man

Now the furthest I can fall is in His hands

Who am I, forgiven?

Now my name is written

On the hands, that were pierced up on the cross

To save me

To save me

Who can stand to condemn me now?

What can shake this solid ground?

The work is done

I put my trust in the Son of Man

Now the furthest I can fall is in His hands

No depth of darkness

No pow’r of earth

Can take away

What I didn’t earn

No condemnation

No sin can stand

Cause the furthest I can fall

Is in His hands

No depth of darkness

No pow’r of earth

Can take away

What I didn’t earn

No condemnation

No sin can stand

Cause the furthest I can fall

Is in His hands

Who can stand to condemn me now?

What can shake this solid ground?

The work is done

I put my trust in the Son of Man

Now the furthest I can fall is in His hands

Who can stand to condemn me now?

What can shake this solid ground?

The work is done

I put my trust in the Son of Man

Now the furthest I can fall is in His hands

Now the furthest I can fall is in His hands

Now the furthest I can fall is in His hands

All Things New - Andrew Peterson

Do you ever fall prey to the "I need to do ___ before I can come to God" lie? The "I need to clean up before I can be made clean" thoughts are amusing when it's other people saying it and you can see the irony, but significantly less amusing when you are caught in the middle of it for yourself.

          Come broken and weary
          Come battered and bruised
          My Jesus makes all things new
          All things new

Friends, can I invite you into the truth? Come however you are - that's how God wants you. He wants to make all things new. Not just that one thing that you trusted him with last month. All things. That secret that you would never share with anyone. That place where you are hurt beyond all measure. He wants to make that part new. The places where you are weakest. The things you try so desperately to hide from everyone.

          Come lost and abandoned
          Come blown by the wind
          He'll bring you back home again
          Home again

Do you crave for something solid, something that won't blow you around like a boat on the tossing sea in the wind? He can be the safe harbor, the home. The place where you go to love, be loved and find rest. Maybe that isn't your home right now. Maybe you've never experienced that sense of peace and home. Can I invite you to a new kind of home?

          So hold on to the promise
          The stories are true 
          that Jesus makes all things new
          (The dawn is upon you.)

Hold on to the promise. The stories are true. Jesus make all things new - including you.

The dawn is upon us. Rise up, sleepers.


(Rise up, oh you sleeper.)
(Rise up, oh you sleeper.)

Come broken and weary
Come battered and bruised
My Jesus makes all things new
All things new

Come lost and abandoned
Come blown by the wind
He'll bring you back home again
Home again

Rise up, oh you sleeper, awake, (Rise up, oh you sleeper.)
The light of the dawn is upon you
Rise up, oh you sleeper, awake, (Rise up, oh you sleeper.)
He makes all things new
All things new

Come frozen with shame
Come burning with guilt
My Jesus, he loves you still
He loves you still

So, rise up, oh you sleeper, awake, (Rise up, oh you sleeper.)
The light of the dawn is upon you
Rise up, oh you sleeper, awake, (Rise up, oh you sleeper.)
He makes all things new
He makes all things new

The world was good, the world is fallen
The world will be redeemed
The world was good, the world is fallen
The world will be redeemed

So hold on to the promise
The stories are true
that Jesus makes all things new
(The dawn is upon you.)

Rise up, oh you sleeper, awake, (Rise up, oh you sleeper.)
The light of the dawn is upon you
Rise up, oh you sleeper, awake, (Rise up, oh you sleeper.)
He makes all things new

Rise up, oh you sleeper, awake, (Rise up, oh you sleeper.)
The light of the dawn is upon you
Rise up, oh you sleeper, awake, (Rise up, oh you sleeper.)
He makes all things new
He makes all things new

All things new. (All things new.)
All things new. (All things new.)
He makes all things new

Tell Me Again - Skye Peterson

Ever had something that you had to hear a lot of times in order to believe it was true?

"You're beautiful"

"I love you"

"You are valuable"

I think part of our human condition is a distrust in what people say. In what we hear that is good about ourselves. Certainly, it is part of my human condition.

It is so easy for me to get lost in the negative. To lose sight of what God has said that is true and real and lovely. It's so easy for me to have a one track mind about the negative things, the mistakes I have made. They replay over and over again in my head. And yet... what God calls us to is to hear His truth over and over again, on replay - to dwell on that and nothing else.

So tell me again
Tell me again
Tell me again
The truth that makes me new

So I'll leave you with the same challenge that we stumbled upon in high school small groups tonight in reading Psalm 119. Verse 99 says "I am always thinking of your laws" - are we always thinking of them? Do we see them for the sweetness? "How sweet your words taste to me; they are sweeter than honey." (Psalm 119:103) Honey is pretty sweet. How often do we turn away from God's word because we find it too sweet? Or the sweetness feels tart? Does that sweetness feel fake? Friends - God is that sweet. His word is for you, it is real. To quote Skye's father: "the stories are true". May we dwell on His word, His truth forever.

Tell me again, God. Tell me again!


Deep within the waters
I'm drowning in my heart
Underneath the surface
and the darkest part

I want to know that He is calling
And to know that He is here
Even when I cannot see Him
And I'm in despair

So tell me again
Tell me again
Tell me again
The truth that makes me new

Every single morning
I cannot see the light
But every day I'm learning
His presence is disguised

I want to know that He is calling
And to know that He is here
Even when I cannot see Him
And I'm in despair

So tell me again
Tell me again
Tell me again
The truth that makes me new

Tell me again
Tell me again
Tell me again
The truth that makes me new

I need a little comfort
I need a little hope
I need a little loving
For You to be my hope

Find You - Audrey Assad

"10...9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1...ready or not here I come!!!"

Hide and go seek. It's a pretty universal game. In one way or another, as a kid or a parent, we've all probably played this game. We've found the perfect hiding place, knowing that we will never be found. We've laughed as others look for us, inches away, but unable to see us.

But. Have you ever actually quit playing?

Or, do you find yourself hiding behind layers of false front, hidden, in plain sight - inches away from the person in front of you. Maybe you call it something different from hide and go seek now. Maybe you call it perfecting your image. Maybe it's a "good poker face". It's your "performance face" - it's the character you are playing in this game we call life.

But are you actually happy in your hiding?? Or do you really want to be found?

I think God has made us wonderfully - to need to be found. With a need to be known. To be seen, for who we are, and loved perfectly, accepted no matter what. With no excuses. With no doubts. With no nagging "but if they really knew me...." thoughts.

As far as nowhere
As far as eye can see
From east to west there is no place you don't breath
When all is laid bare at the bottom of my grief
I will find you

At the bottom of my grief I will find you. What power there is. When we have hit the bottom of the pain, of the grief. It is there where we can find God. You see - we both need to be found, and we need to be the seeker. In finding God, we find ourselves. We find someone who knows us beyond all concepts and movements of the mind. When we make our bed below the earth, there we will find Him.

What are you grieving? Where are you hiding? What are you hiding from? What are you afraid of? What will it cost you if you come out of your hiding spot? Who will you be real with? Who will you allow to find you? Are you willing to sink to the bottom of your grief, lay it out and find Him?

Friends, you aren't doing this alone. Reach out. We'll pitch our tent with you.

"I see you!!! I found you!!!"


Beyond ideas
Beyond the veil of time
Beyond all color and bending of the light
Beyond all concepts and movements of the mind
I will find you

As far as nowhere
As far as eye can see
From east to west there is no place you don't breath
When all is laid bare at the bottom of my grief
I will find you

If I make my bed below the earth
If I make my bed below the earth
If I make my bed below the earth
I will find you

If I make my bed below the earth
If I make my bed below the earth
If I make my bed below the earth
I will find you

Speak - Bethany Music

Silence. Pain. Loneliness. Asleep. Numb. Distant.

Wherever you go when the light is off. When the darkness closes in. When you come to the end of the day and your to do list isn't done. The project you were working on is unfinished. Or "as finished as it's going to get" but you aren't satisfied. When the worst case scenario runs through your head and you don't know how to fix it. When relationships are broken and you don't know how to fix them. When your perfectionism streak has left you unsatisfied or prickly. When you have given everything you have to care for someone else and you find yourself left empty.

When, in the end, you find yourself feeling unloved.

I wanna hear you, 
louder than the noise
I wanna feel you, 
closer than the air I breathe
Deep within my soul burning

What noise do you find ringing in your ears even in the silence? What voice are you listening to? Is it a voice of truth? Because, friends, the enemy wants to scream so loud that you can't hear God's whisper. The whisper of His love for you.

Speak to me let my heart
Be awakened by the whispering of love
Pull me close to your heart
Let the silence now be filled with Your voice

What are you allowing to fill your silence? Whose voice are you listening to? The lies that you are not good enough? The lie that you need to self medicate to get through the day? Or the promises of Jesus:

You're with me
You're for me
You have a plan for me
And I will never walk alone

I will never walk alone. Sit. Rest. Enjoy the Father's love that pours out on you and says you will never walk alone. That He is with you and He is for you.


I wanna hear you,
louder than the noise
I wanna feel you,
closer than the air I breathe
Deep within my soul burning

Speak to me let my heart
Be awakened by the whispering of love
Pull me close to your heart
Let the silence now be filled with Your voice

Found in surrender,
my heart is fully Yours
Caught in the moment,
captivated by the unseen
Your loving heart for me revealed

Speak to me let my heart
Be awakened by the whispering of love
Pull me close to your heart
Let the silence now be filled with Your voice

The words I hear you say
You've been speaking now for all of time
All of time

The words I hear you say
You've been speaking now for all of time
All of time

The words I hear you say
You've been speaking now for all of time
All of time

You're with me
You're for me
You have a plan for me
And I will never walk alone

You're with me
You're for me
You have a plan for me
And I will never walk alone

Speak to me let my heart
Be awakened by the whispering of love
Pull me close to your heart
Let the silence now be filled with Your voice

Speak to me let my heart
Be awakened by the whispering of love
Pull me close to your heart
Let the silence now be filled with Your voice
Filled with Your voice

Source: Musixmatch