It's one of those cans of worms that sometimes we don't like to open and talk about, because it is messy, and hurts, and means we have to think about what has happened to us, and how we reacted.
I've been listening to a podcast recently put out by Proverbs 31 ministries (they did a 6 week special called "Therapy and Theology" - it's worth checking out - this links to a specific episode, but all 6 are there) and this morning I listened to a section talking about the process of forgiveness. That we start by forgiving the facts (what happened)... and then we go on to working on forgiving the impact (how it affected me)... and through that we look at the track that a past hurt that needed to be forgiven have put us on - how did we cope with the impact. That the process of forgiveness involves looking at and forgiving all three of these steps.
I think this frees me a little. That it isn't a one and done thing. That it isn't a just forgive the facts and move on. That it involves digging into what happened, what that did to me personally, and then what I did with that.
We were created for the garden, in His image. We made choices that removed us from that space, that then required blood to cover our choices (the killing of an animal to make clothes for Adam and Eve). From then on, purification came through the blood of an animal, until Jesus. But it's important to remember that God didn't rush through forgiveness either. It wasn't sin enters the world and immediately Jesus comes to take away that sin. There was a process to get to there.
I will praise you, I will praise you
For the life You gave, what else can I say?
O my Savior, friend and Savior
All my heart is Yours forevermore
Our praise is not based on the goodness of our situation, rather it is based on the goodness of God. If we keep our focus firmly rooted in the truth of God, the praise will come... We praise Him for who He is, not who we are. For what HE has done, not what others have done to us. So even in the middle of the messy process of forgiveness, we can praise Him.
Wounded for me, wounded for me
There on the cross He was wounded for me
Now I'm forgiven and now I am free
All because Jesus was wounded for me
Dying for me, dying for me
There on the cross He was dying for me
Now in His death my redemption I see
All because Jesus was dying for me
I will praise you, I will praise you
For the life You gave, what else can I say?
O my Savior, friend and Savior
All my heart is Yours forevermore
Risen for me, risen for me
Up from the grave He is risen for me
Now evermore from death's sting I am free
All because Jesus has risen for me
I will praise you, I will praise you
For the life You gave, what else can I say?
O my Savior, friend and Savior
All my heart is Yours forevermore
Yes, my heart is Yours forevermore
Every scar, a sacrifice of praise
A song I'll sing for all my days
Jesus, all because of You
Every wound a wonder of Your grace
Blood poured out in freedom's name
Jesus, all because of You
For the life You gave, what else can I say?
O my Savior, friend and Savior
All my heart is Yours forevermore
Yes, my heart is Yours forevermore
Forevermore
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