It's rising, it's rsising, the song of hope from us set free
Our chord chart at church for this song has a typo. It's not an egregious mistake or anything. You probably didn't even notice it above. I don't know how many times I led the song before I noticed it. But one morning, years ago now, during sound check someone actually pronounced it the way it's spelled as "it's rising, resizing, the song of hope from us set free"... And we all laughed, and we went on with rehearsal.
Every time since then, though, I see the line and laugh.
But this morning... as I was listening to the song to prepare to lead it again this weekend, I got thinking... What God has done for us does resize our praise. Our praise is both rising and resizing. We belong to the father. We are orphans no longer.
How that resizes my praise!
We belong to You Father
Love has come, we're orphans no longer
Brought into Your light and freedom
By the blood and the mercy of Jesus
It's rising, it's rising, the song of hope
From us set free
It's rising, it's rising, it's rising up
Hallelujah to You God of the redeemed
Hallelujah, You've opened blinded eyes to see
We will praise You
You are the everlasting light
Hallelujah to You God of the redeemed
We belong to You Father
Living for Your glory and honor
Here on earth, just as in heaven
We usher in the reign of Your Kingdom
Christmas songs sometimes have a way of "idealizing" what the first Christmas must have been like, either removing the very real pain that Mary and Joseph would have been feeling, or removing the messiness that is real life. While Jesus's birth is absolutely a reason to celebrate and rejoice and sing Joy to the World with the angels, it is also a time to recognize a beautiful young woman who brought that savior into the world.
I love that this song talks about both - it was a labor of pain, it was a labor of love. It was messy (there was blood on the ground) and full of fear (there were no midwives to be found) - but they did what they needed to do to bring into the world this precious baby. We think of that baby as our Savior (because that's who He was) but to them he was their child. Their baby - to love and care for and raise up. To kiss his boo boos, to bandage his finger, to hold, to feed, to care for. A very real human experience, bringing a baby into the world, accompanied by the knowledge that this was the son of God.
It was not a silent night... it was a labor of love.
It was not a silent night
There was blood on the ground
You could hear a woman cry
In the alleyways that night
On the streets of David's town
And the stable was not clean
And the cobblestones were cold
And little Mary full of grace
With the tears upon her face
Had no mother's hand to hold
It was a labor of pain
It was a cold sky above
But for the girl on the ground in the dark
With every beat of her beautiful heart
It was a labor of love
Noble Joseph at her side
Callused hands and weary eyes
There were no midwives to be found
On the streets of David's town
In the middle of the night
So he held her and he prayed
Shafts of moonlight on his face
For the baby in her womb
He was the maker of the moon
He was the author of the faith
That could make the mountains move
It was a labor of pain
It was a cold sky above
But for the girl on the ground in the dark
With every beat of her beautiful heart
It was a labor of love
For little Mary full of grace
With the tears upon her face
It was a labor of love
It was not a silent night
On the streets of David's town
In despair I bowed my head, there is no peace on earth I said, for hate is strong and mocks the song of peace on earth good will to men.
It's so easy to get lost in the daily "things" and the stuff of the season to lose sight of the goal of Christmas: peace on earth and good will to men. Jesus was sent to bring peace on earth and good will to men. Biblically, that is the point of Christmas. A savior is born, it is good news to all the earth because He brings peace on earth. But the deal is that His peace is so very different from our definition of peace that I think it gets lost.
God's peace isn't about an earthly kingdom, or a lack of warring countries - it's about a lack of war between God and us. Our sinful nature is put to death, it is ended and finished. We have peace on earth - that couldn't be found here before. Because the war between our sinful nature and God's perfection has been won by God's grace on the cross.
Oh Jesus, Oh Jesus, shine your light on us, shine your light on us.
Yes, Lord Jesus, shine your light into our tired land. May your light prevail.
I heard the bells on Christmas Day
Their old familiar carols play
And wild and sweet the words repeat
Of Peace on Earth good will to men
I thought how as the day had come
The belfries of all Christendom
Had rolled along the unbroken song
Of peace on earth good will to men
Oh Jesus, Oh Jesus
Shine Your light on us
Shine Your light on us
And in despair I bowed my head
There is no peace on earth I said
For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth good will to men
Oh Jesus, Oh Jesus
Shine Your light on us
Shine Your light on us
Then pealed the bells more loud and deep
God is not dead, nor does he sleep
The dark shall fail, God's light prevail
With peace on earth good will to men
Oh Jesus, Oh Jesus
Shine Your light on us
Shine Your light on us
This song is on the radio some, but not in the acoustic mix. I stumbled across this version in Spotify a few weeks ago, and can't get enough of it. I'm discovering more and more how much I really like simple... solo voice, maybe two, guitar... not much else.
The other day I was thinking to myself made a list of all my mistakes...
How well I identify with this line. The ability to rattle off a list a mile long of all the mistakes I've made (today). And the choice daily of what to do with those mistakes. Do you decide it's the end and that you can't get to the "right" finish because you took the "wrong" path? Where do you go with your list of mistakes?
Sometimes I take my mistakes to people who I know are like salt in an open wound. You know the ones, the people who will make you feel even worse. Who will "rub your nose in it". Sometimes I take my mistakes to my Father - who knows me, who loves me, and who will help to clear the infection made by those mistakes. (Which, I should add, might still be painful... but that's a topic for a different post) My Father who says "you gotta get back up again... you CAN get up again."
Do you get stuck in the place of "I can't"? The "I've screwed it all up so royally there's no recovery for me" spot? Just remember: And I guess not every little thing Works out just the way you dreamed You can take a couple wrong turns Still end up where you're supposed to be
Our God is the maker of the paths. There is no path so far gone that He can't get you back where you're supposed to be.
The other day, I was thinking to myself
Made a list of all my mistakes
Oh, I wish I could've run to you
And tell you all about my heartbreak
And I wondered to myself "Wait a minute
Am I even on the right path now?"
Had a couple wins, but I got knocked down
But I know if you were still around, you would say
Sometimes you lose, sometimes you win
You gotta get up, up again
Keep holding on, it's not the end
You gotta get up, up again
You can get up, up again
You can get up, up again
And I guess not every little thing
Works out just the way you dreamed
You can take a couple wrong turns
Still end up where you're supposed to be
And even though in a moment
I know anything can change
You're perfect plans might fall apart
But the simple truth remains
Sometimes you lose, sometimes you win
You gotta get up, up again
Keep holding on, it's not the end
You gotta get up, up again
You, you can get up, up again
You can get up, up again
You, you can get up, up again
You can get up, up again
'Cause you've only got one life
And you don't know when it ends
You've only got one heart
So get out there and live
Yeah, you've only got one life
Don't let it get away
Everyone falls down
But you can get up, up again
You, you can get up, up again
You can get up, up again
And I guess not every little thing
Works out just the way you dreamed
You can take a couple wrong turns
Still end up where you're supposed to be
Thanksgiving is coming up this week. For the month of November many people count blessings, or post things they are thankful for, spend time focusing on gratitude. I see it on Facebook, as people challenge each other to think of things they are thankful for, I see it in my kids classrooms as they are asked to write about things they are thankful for, I've done it in my classroom, creating a Thanksgiving turkey out of my students hands listing things they are thankful for:
The point is that gratitude and thankfulness is a choice. That when we see the beauty and gifts around us we have to chose to be thankful.
So what choice will you make today? What can I do but THANK you.
When I see the beauty Of the sunset's glory Amazing artistry Across the evening sky When I feel the mystery Of a distant galaxy It awes and humbles me To be loved by a God so high
What can I do but thank you What can I do but give My life to you Hallelujah, hallelujah What can I do but praise you Every day make everything I do A hallelujah, a hallelujah Hallelujah
When I hear the story Of a God of mercy Who shared humanity And suffered by our side Of the cross they nailed you to That could not hold you Now you're making all things new By the power of your risen life
Last weekend our sermons at both campuses were about worry. Both sermons are really good (check them out here for Steve at East Hills and here for Josh at the Grove). Steve talked about how when he's really stressed, he'll draw a basket, and then write all of the different things he is worried about down above the basket, as if he was putting his worries into the basket, and then he'll work on remembering that those things are in God's basket now. Josh talked about how worrying is trying to take control of things we can't control, and that when we worry it is proof that we are afraid to surrender. Peace, Josh said, is realizing we are not in control and that that's okay. Peace is a result, not a goal.
After hearing Steve's sermon Saturday night, Jesse posted this video. Sunday morning, I listened to the song about a dozen times (before I heard Josh's sermon). It hit hard. Have you ever had dreams that you wanted to cling to more than anything because you feel like they are God's plan, and by golly they need to happen? After all, this is something that I feel like God Himself has promised, so why wouldn't they be coming true RIGHT NOW? And how could this thing that is currently happening that feels so contrary to that dream possibly be from God, and it's screwing up the PLAN. My plan. For how this thing that God has promised is going to happen.
I can't begin to imagine what Moses's mother is feeling when she lays her baby into the river. In a basket she feels like God has told her to weave, floating her infant son away from her. The pain. The terror. The fear. She had no control. None. And instead of worrying about what was going to happen in the thing she couldn't control, she releases the basket to God.
And great things, great things, come from that. An entire people group is rescued from slavery, led to their promised land, given covenants from God...
If I think through the different promises, covenants even, that are in the old testament, I notice a pattern. God makes a promise. People look at the promise, try to figure out how that could possibly happen, doubt the steps along the way, get in the way by making their own choices, and then eventually God shows up and proves otherwise. See, God rarely gets to His promise in the way we would expect. I can't imagine that Joseph in jail (Genesis 39) was really thinking that "oh yes, I see it how you're going to make that dream come true". That isn't the point. The point is that God will make good on His promises.
So. Weave the basket. Put your dreams in. And then put it in God's hand. Lay it down in the river, because there is noone like You, God.
Note: Jesse explains some about this song before where this video here will start, if you want to listen to his explanation about the song, just rewind :-)
I've woven the basket,
I've thought out the plan
Put my dreams in
I've woven the basket,
I've thought out the plan
Put my dreams in
Now I put it in Your hands
I put it in Your hands
My hands have been full
Of all that You gave
I held them close to my chest
I gripped them so tight
As though they were mine
Now I lay it all down
I put it in Your hands
I put it in Your hands
Who is like the Lord
Who is like the Lord
There's noone like You, Lord
Who is like the Lord
Who is like the Lord
There's noone like You, Lord
I put it in Your hands
I put it in Your hands
I've woven the basket
I've thought out the plan
Put my dreams in
Enough.
It's a word we hear a lot...
"THAT'S ENOUGH!!" screams the frustrated mother.
"Have I done enough?" asks the student, wondering if they have studied all the materials for a big test.
"When will it be enough?" asks the husband who has caught his wife cheating... again...
"Enough for today..." says the tired teacher who can't seem to get through to their students.
"Am I not enough for him?" says the worried wife who has just caught her husband looking at pornography again.
enough
enough
enough
Am. I. Enough.
There is something about this question that haunts me, and I think intrinsically maybe haunts us all. In the end, are we enough? Am I enough in my marriage? Am I enough for my kids? Am I enough as a teacher? Am I enough as a Christian? Am I enough for Jesus?
But that isn't actually the question - of course we are not enough!
The question is: is Jesus enough for you. If you were without anything, nothing that you find you want or think you need on a daily basis. Without that - would God still be enough for you? When it all goes wrong, remind me that you never fail.
If nothing else but You remains, let it be enough...even when my eyes can't see... you are enough.
Because it is in that moment, that moment when you find that God is enough for you, then suddenly, at that moment you are enough. Because it is in our most broken and humbled and empty and willing to serve form that God can look at us and say "well done, you are enough."
It's a funny kind of currency - that when we are nothing we are enough, and when we are full of ourselves on our own we can never be enough. It is only through Jesus that we can put aside fear and shame, finding our enough in Him. The one who made us and loves us.
May He be enough for your today.
Disclaimer:
This song is a fairly new release, and apparently the singer/author hasn't put it out in an easy to link to from here. So here's a link to iheartradio, Spotify and Apple Music. As soon as I find it on youtube I'll update this post to include it, right now there is only a video of her talking about her newest song (Enough).
When all hope seems lost
When I feel afraid
When it all goes wrong
Remind me that you never fail
Remind me that you never fail
Let your Spirit wash upon my face
and turn my grieving into praise
and if nothing else but you remains
let it be enough
Oh let me raise this simple song
for the one who gave it all
I am nothing Lord without your love
Let it be, let it be enough
Let it be enough
When I can't find sleep
When my eye is worn
When I can't find peace
Remind me that you never fail
Remind me that you never fail
Let your Spirit wash upon my face
and turn my grieving into praise
and if nothing else but you remains
let it be enough
Oh let me raise this simple song
for the one who gave it all
I am nothing Lord without your love
Let it be, let it be enough
Let it be enough
Even when my eyes can't see
Even when I am in need
Even then my soul will sing
you are enough
you are enough
Even when my eyes can't see
Even when I am in need
Even then my soul will sing
you are enough
you are enough
Let your Spirit wash upon my face
and turn my grieving into praise
and if nothing else but you remains
let it be enough
Oh let me raise this simple song
for the one who gave it all
I am nothing Lord without your love
Let it be, let it be enough
Let it be enough
The words echo around in my head, as I feel torn between conflicting messages. I'll go where You send me. I'll stay where You've planted me. I'll follow where You lead me, follow you anywhere (see here). I'll wait for you (here), I'll stay right here while the waves crash in around me.
This (new) song by Native Kingdom perfectly summarizes for me these conflicting directions and emotions, and I strain to hear God's whisper over me: I need to hear You speak Your promises to me I need to hear You speak, O Jesus Surrender to Your will I’ll follow where You lead I need to hear You speak, O Jesus
O Jesus, how I need to hear you speak Your promises. Your truth.
What are the promises God has spoken over you? You are chosen... You are loved... I will make you a great nation... I will prepare a feast for you in the presence of your enemies...
Fear will not have the final word I’m waiting here until You whisper
I'm waiting here until You whisper... I'll not listen to the voices around me telling me lies and falsehoods - the people who tell me that I deserve better... that I have earned better. Because I know the truth - I will receive better, but not in this life.
Surrender to Your will, I'll follow where You lead, I need to hear You speak, O Jesus.
Where are you leading me? Where do you want me to go, what do you want me to say, today, to that person you have put in front of me?
Is it about moving when it seems tough? Is it about leaving when too much is asked? or is it about leaning in, quieting my heart and listening for God's whisper, right where I am. I'm not saying God doesn't call people to follow, in hard and challenging and amazing and grace-giving ways. What I am saying is don't go without his voice. Listen for His voice.
Speak to me, speak to me... I need to hear You speak... I'll wait for You to speak...
Your voice is freedom for my soul
Your love is drawing my heart closer
Fear will not have the final word
I’m waiting here until You whisper
I need to hear You speak Your promises to me
I need to hear You speak, O Jesus
Surrender to Your will
I’ll follow where You lead
I need to hear You speak, O Jesus
I walk by faith and not by sight
Your truth is holding back the darkness
I know your plans for me are good
I dare not wander from your presence
I need to hear You speak Your promises to me
I need to hear You speak, O Jesus
Surrender to Your will
I’ll follow where You lead
I need to hear You speak, O Jesus
I'm listening, You have my attention
I'm leaning in, Come and break the silence
Much more than bread,
I hunger for Your words
Speak to me now, Oh Lord
I need to hear You speak Your promises to me
I need to hear You speak, O Jesus
Surrender to Your will
I’ll follow where You lead
I need to hear You speak, O Jesus
Speak to me, speak to me
I need to hear You speak, O Jesus
Surrender to Your will
I'll follow where You lead
I need to hear You speak, O Jesus
I need to hear You speak
I'll wait for You to speak
You know those days where you don't feel like doing anything... not even a little bit? I've definitely been having that feeling for the last couple of days. As such, you end up with a blog on Thursday instead of Wednesday, and I'm left wondering if I even care that I missed. Which is weird for me - I'm normally super focused on following the rules, and the rules say that this is "Wendy's Weekly Words of Worship on Wednesdays" (for no real reason, other than that it's lots of Ws and I like Ws... for a while my address had 5 Ws in it and it made me really happy).
While sometimes rules can be helpful, they help us live together harmoniously, they keep us safe, they provide structure in areas of our life where we are sadly lacking structure, and they can give a healthy context from which to interact with other people, other rules are important to break - to realize they are faulty and unhelpful.
When I was little, I had made a "rule" that if it flew it was a duck. As children we create classification rules. At some point a starling flew down our chimney and into our house. I promptly went and told my mother "Momma duck in living room!!!!" She said "No, no duck in the living room." "BUT MAMA, DUCK!!!!!" You see, I was right there was a bird in the living room - but there wasn't a duck. The problem was that years later (long after I learned that my classification system had an error) I still thought a duck had been in our living room. Because that was the words I had used at the time to describe the situation.
How often are your rules holding you back? Holding you into definitions that are not real, that are not based on truth? Are your memories of events colored by that as well? Do you remember something as bad because that was how you defined it then? Is it possible that later you learned it wasn't, but that your memory is still colored by that?
To cross over the line
Leave it all behind
Nothing's gonna keep me here
Oh, until I see a change
I'm lifting up Your name
There's freedom in the atmosphere
Cross the line, leave it behind... break the faulty rules in your head and become whole and free in the change that he provides. I'm gonna breakthrough.
This is where my heart will beat again
This is where I get set free
This is where Your love is calling me
I'm ready, yeah, I'm ready
To cross over the line
Leave it all behind
Nothing's gonna keep me here
Oh, until I see a change
I'm lifting up Your name
There's freedom in the atmosphere
Oh, I feel like dancing
I feel like praising You
'Cause I know, this is my breakthrough
I'm gonna see You move
This is my breakthrough
This is my breakthrough
I'm gonna breakthrough
This is where Your word takes hold of me
And this is where my fear lets go
Your Spirit is alive inside of me
I'm ready, yeah, I'm ready
To cross over the line
Leave it all behind
Nothing's gonna keep me here
Oh, until I see a change
I'm lifting up Your name
There's freedom in the atmosphere
Oh, I feel like dancing
I feel like praising You
'Cause I know, this is my breakthrough
I'm gonna see You move
This is my breakthrough
This is my breakthrough
I'm gonna breakthrough
This is my breakthrough
This is my breakthrough
I'm gonna breakthrough
I'll keep on dancing, I'll keep on singing
I'll keep on praising You
I'll keep on dancing, I'll keep on singing
I'll keep on breaking through
I'll keep on dancing, I'll keep on singing
I'll keep on praising You
I'll keep on dancing, I'll keep on singing
I'll keep on breaking through
Oh, I feel like dancing
I feel like praising You
'Cause I know, this is my breakthrough
I'm gonna see You move
And oh, I feel like dancing
I feel like praising You
'Cause I know, this is my breakthrough
I'm gonna see You move
This is my breakthrough
This is my breakthrough
I'm gonna breakthrough
In my work I often run into students who have pretty messed up home lives. From parents in prison, to drug addicts, to teen parents who left kids with grandparents to go live their own lives, my students come from backgrounds that I can't begin to imagine (nor do I want to). And I'm put in a unique situation of being able to love my students (hopefully well) with a love that comes from Christ, that is different from what they have experienced or could imagine.
Father to the fatherless, defender of the weak
Freedom for the prisoner, we sing
Do you sing that? Does your life sing that out? If people looked at your interactions with people, do they sing out that Christ brings freedom for the prisoner? Are you living in freedom? Because these promises are not just for my students who have clearly broken childhoods - it's for all of us. Are you living like you're free? Or are you slipping your wrists back into unlocked shackles, claiming prisoner?
Sing out lift your voice and cry out
Awesome is our strong God mighty is our God
Our God is strong and mighty - He breaks the chains and unbolts the shackles. And He is with us, no matter where we go. So... whether in full voice or full action, sing out - let your voice be lifted and cry out about the awesomeness of our God.
May my life fully reflect the freedom for the prisoner - that He defends the weak. Not just the weak around me, but the weak in me. May my voice ring out both as it does in this song, out loud, but also as the quiet whisper of me loving on my students - providing them with the hope that they have a Father, a defender, and a future living in freedom.
Father to the fatherless Defender of the weak
Freedom for the prisoner we sing
This is God in His holy place
This is God clothed in love and strength
Sing out lift your voice and cry out
Awesome is our strong God mighty is our God
You're with us in the wilderness faithful to provide
Ev'ry breath and ev'ry step we see
Sing out lift your voice and cry out
Awesome is our strong God mighty is our God
Sing out raise your hands and shout out
Awesome is our strong God mighty is our God
There is no higher, no,
There is no greater, no,
There is none stronger than our God.
Today I am struck by how little I can see. How big the world around me is. How much there is going on that I don't know. The experience of others that I can't even begin to imagine. And when I think think about how much God knows, the secrets He holds. 🤯
So this is the cry of my heart now, because I know so little, and He knows so much, because His ways are so much better than mine:
How beautiful this life can be
When there's more of You
And less of me
Oh, Jesus, You are all I need
So give me more of You
And less of me
I also think intrinsic in this is my desire that I actually truly want this all the time. I am by nature a control freak. I like to be in control - of myself, of my emotions, of others, of everything. And God very much asks me to give that up and trust His control. Help me to realize, Jesus, that You are all I need, and that I need more of You and less of me.
Beyond the depths of the horizon
Beyond the shores of foreign seas
Beyond the stars we haven't found yet
Beyond the secrets of the deep
There is more than what I see here
There is more than earthly dreams
There is Heaven to be found here
If I am still enough to see
How beautiful this life can be
When there's more of You
And less of me
Oh, Jesus, You are all I need
So give me more of You
And less of me
Within the heart of Your creation
Within the depths of every soul
Within the beauty of the mystery
Oh, the wonder to behold
How beautiful this life can be
When there's more of You
And less of me
Oh, Jesus, You are all I need
So give me more of You
And less of me
There is more
Where You are more
There is more
Where You are more
There is more
Where You are more
There is more
Where You are more
How beautiful this life can be
When there's more of You
And less of me
Oh, Jesus, You are all I need
So give me more of You
And less of me
Give me more of You
And less of me
There is Heaven to be found here
If I am still enough to see
Wherever You lead me
Whatever it costs me
All I want is You
Jesus, all I want is You
This song is high challenge for me. As a pastor's wife, sometimes I talk church with my husband (sometimes?? ok, all the time)... We talk a lot about making church high invitation and high challenge. We talk about the balance between those two things - that we need to be inviting new believers in, that we are high invitation, everyone and I do mean everyone can come to Jesus, no matter what, that He loves and forgives and holds us tight. But we also need to be high challenge - that what we do pushes everyone closer to Jesus, no matter how long they have been following Jesus, that we are all pushed closer to Him.
Can I just say that some of those moments are scary? Like hold onto the handles and scream as you rush down the roller coaster of life scary? Because if we sing this song and actually mean it - YIKES! Hold onto your hair because it might just fly off in the wind!
Wherever you lead me
Whatever it costs me
All I want is You
Jesus, all I want is You
Simple notes to sing. But gosh the cost that could mean! All I want is You... I'll follow you anywhere.
God may you shine bright like a fire in the night that I can see where to follow... Say the word, and I'll be there.
You make it easy to love You
You are good and You are kind
You bring joy into my life
You make it easy to trust You
You have never left my side
You've been faithful every time
All I want is You
Jesus, all I want is You
You are the refuge I run to
You are the fire that leads me through the night
I'll follow You anywhere
There's a million reasons to trust You
Nothing to fear for You are by my side
I'll follow You anywhere
Oh Jesus, You came to my rescue
Took my place upon that cross
You redeemed what I had lost
Now my whole world revolving around You
Yes
You're the center of my life
You're the treasure, You're the prize
All I want is You
Jesus, all I want is You
You are the refuge I run to
You are the fire that leads me through the night
I'll follow You anywhere
There's a million reasons to trust You
Nothing to fear for You are by my side
I'll follow You anywhere
Follow You anywhere
I'll follow You anywhere
Wherever You lead me
Whatever it costs me
All I want is You
Jesus, all I want is You
Wherever You lead me
Whatever it costs me
All I want is You
Jesus, all I want is You
Wherever You lead me
Whatever it costs me
All I want is You
Jesus, all I want is You
You are the refuge I run to
You are the fire that leads me through the night
I'll follow You anywhere
There's a million reasons to trust You
Nothing to fear for You are by my side
I'll follow You anywhere
Follow You anywhere
Woah
I'll follow You anywhere
Woah
Follow You anywhere
I've been struck recently by a line from Daniel 3, "But even if he doesn't [save us], we want to make it clear to you, Your Majesty, that we will never serve your gods or worship the gold statue you have set up."
I know the "Even If" movement is not young - it's been a catch phrase for lots of different Christian movements, printed on shirts, bracelets, etc... I'm just a whole lot late.
But today - today... I definitely empathize with this song. "I've stood on this stage night after night, reminding the broken it'll be alright, but right now, oh right now I just can't." Oh how well do I know this feeling. The last few weeks as I've stood on stage... I've been reminded that I have no business being up front leading. But the reality is, do any of us? There is none that is worthy, no not one.
Right then is when Daniel and his friends are saying "Even if"...
"I know you're able and I know you can, save through the fire with Your mighty hand, but even if you don't, my hope is you alone, I know the sorrow, and I know the hurt would all go away if You'd just say the word, but even if You don't my hope is You alone."
Even in the middle of the broken, even in the middle of the pain that seems unbearable. Even then. Even if you don't. I will still choose You, Jesus. My hope is still in You.
It is well with my soul. Not just even when I am broken... but especially when I am broken. It is well with my broken soul. Because I am broken for Jesus.
They say sometimes you win some
Sometimes you lose some
And right now, right now I'm losing bad
I've stood on this stage night after night
Reminding the broken it'll be alright
But right now, oh right now I just can't
It's easy to sing
When there's nothing to bring me down
But what will I say
When I'm held to the flame
Like I am right now
I know You're able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
They say it only takes a little faith
To move a mountain
Well good thing
A little faith is all I have, right now
But God, when You choose
To leave mountains unmovable
Oh give me the strength to be able to sing
It is well with my soul
I know You're able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
I know the sorrow, and I know the hurt
Would all go away if You'd just say the word
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
You've been faithful, You've been good
All of my days
Jesus, I will cling to You
Come what may
'Cause I know You're able
I know You can
I know You're able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
I know the sorrow, I know the hurt
Would all go away if You'd just say the word
But even if You don't
My hope is You alone
It is well with my soul
It is well, it is well with my soul
"When I thought I lost me
You knew where I left me
You reintroduced me to Your love
You picked up all my pieces
Put me back together
You are the defender of my heart"
Some days you just need the reminder that God knows where you are, knows where all your pieces are, and wants to put you back together.
"All I did was praise
All I did was worship
All I did was bow down
All I did was stay still"
Today was one of those days, where I think I didn't know where to go, where I was, what I was doing, who I was... And instead of curling up in a corner and crying like I wanted to, I pulled down the guitar off the wall and sat down with some worship music and just praised God. Just stay still, worship.
"Hallelujah, You have saved me
So much better this way
Hallelujah, great Defender
So much better this way"
So much better HIS way.
You go before I know
That You've gone to win my war
You come back with the head of my enemy
You come back and You call it my victory
You go before I know
That You've gone to win my war
Your love becomes my greatest defense
It leads me from the dry wilderness
All I did was praise
All I did was worship
All I did was bow down
All I did was stay still
Hallelujah, You have saved me
So much better Your way
Hallelujah, great Defender
So much better Your way
You know before I do
Where my heart can seek to find Your truth
Your mercy is the shade I'm living in
You restore my faith and hope again
All I did was praise
All I did was worship
All I did was bow down
All I did was stay still
Hallelujah, You have saved me
So much better this way
Hallelujah, great Defender
So much better this way
Hallelujah, You have saved me
So much better Your way
Hallelujah, great Defender
So much better Your way
When I thought I lost me
You knew where I left me
You reintroduced me to Your love
You picked up all my pieces
Put me back together
You are the defender of my heart
When I thought I lost me
You knew where I left me
You reintroduced me to Your love
You picked up all my pieces
Put me back together
You are the defender of my heart
Hallelujah, You have saved me
So much better this way
Hallelujah, great Defender
So much better Your way
Hallelujah, You have saved me
So much better this way
Hallelujah, great Defender
So much better Your way
All I did was praise
All I need to do is worship
Lord I will just bow down
I'm just gonna stay still
Sometimes simple songs with a few lyrics make a bigger impression on me. Sometimes contexts when I have heard a song make a bigger impression on me. And sometimes, those two things collide, and a song takes on a power bigger than anything could be by itself.
My first weekend leading worship officially was Dec 31, 2016. Why do I know that date? Because my father unexpectedly passed on Dec 29... and two days later I chose to lead worship (lest some of you get after my worship pastor for allowing me to lead, it was very much my choice, not something he forced me to do). You see, our church is very much our family. While grieving, I needed to be with my family.
On that Saturday night we led this song. And the words took on a new meaning, as I thought about the fact that God is the one who "gives life" and "restores the hearts that are broken". As I watched my father in the hospital, I watched machines put oxygen into his lungs for him. And I had the choice - do I praise God in the midst of the pain, or do I get mad and try to take control? How do I use the breath that God has put into my lungs? Do I pour it out in praise? Do I allow him to pour new life into my lungs, and restore my heart that has been broken? Or do I wallow in the pain?
Please don't get me wrong - I am not advocating for not feeling, or not grieving. I was truly broken in that moment. The loss was huge. But the opportunity to be very real, broken, and still praising God is what sped me on my journey towards healing and grieving well. Finding the way to praise in the middle of pain is finding the way towards God. To recognize that He is so much bigger than me, and knows so much more, can comprehend so much more.
"And all the earth will shout Your praise
Our hearts will cry, these bones will sing
Great are You, Lord"
You give life, You are love
You bring light to the darkness
You give hope, You restore
Every heart that is broken
Great are You, Lord
It's Your breath in our lungs
So we pour out our praise
We pour out our praise
It's Your breath in our lungs
So we pour out our praise to You only
And all the earth will shout Your praise
Our hearts will cry, these bones will sing
Great are You, Lord
This song was playing a couple weeks ago before church as the preservice music while the worship team was meeting to pray and get prepared to lead the service. I was trying to pray, and got totally distracted by the words that I know well... it's not a song I'd never heard, it was just the first time I had heard it in this way.
"You redeem, You redeem
You restore what's been stolen from me
You reclaim, You release
You rebuild with the words that You breathe
You redeem"
That thing in your life that feels like it can't possibly ever be good. Like it is miserable for everyone and will never possibly amount to anything good. That thing. That's what God is talking about when He says that He can redeem even the worst possible thing. God can restore what has been stolen from you, reclaim, release and rebuild.
Where do you need God's redemption in your life right now? Is it chronic pain? A relationship that is fractured and feels beyond repair? An addiction? The end of a marriage? The daily grind of a job that feels meaningless and impossible? God can and will redeem. And while His timing for that may not feel as fast as I want it, I remain confident in the fact that He is the redeemer. It is not me.
"Miracles will happen
Healing will come
The plans of our enemy ruined undone
Miracles will happen
Healing will come
Here in your presence lost in Your Love
Miracles will happen
Healing will come
The plans of our enemy ruined undone
Miracles will happen
Healing will come
Wrecked by Your presence I'm lost in Your Love"
May you find yourself wrecked by His presence and lost in His love.
Poverty loses its grip
Race can no longer divide
Wherever your spirit is
Every darkness dies
Freedom is here with us
Burdens will fall like chains
Beauty will rise from the dust
All that's lost will be regained
You redeem, You redeem
You restore what's been stolen from me
You reclaim, You release
You rebuild with the words that You breathe
You redeem
Mercy will pour down like rain
Justice will come for the weak
Lies that were meant to defame
Will be crushed by the the truth that you speak
You redeem, You redeem
You restore what's been stolen from me
You reclaim, You release
You rebuild with the words that You breathe
You redeem
Miracles will happen
Healing will come
The plans of our enemy ruined undone
Miracles will happen
Healing will come
Here in your presence lost in Your Love
Miracles will happen
Healing will come
The plans of our enemy ruined undone
Miracles will happen
Healing will come
Wrecked by Your presence I'm lost in Your Love
You redeem, You redeem
You restore what's been stolen from me
You reclaim, You release
You rebuild with the words that You breathe
You redeem, You redeem
Let Your revival awaken me
You reclaim, You release
You rebuild what's been broken in me
You redeem
You redeem
I was reminded the other day about a detail in a story I've read many times that I had overlooked. In Daniel 3, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego are thrown into the blazing hot furnace. Verse 27 says "Not a hair on their heads was singed, and their clothing was not scorched. They didn't even smell of smoke!"
Not only does God promise that He will walk with us in those times of fire (as he did in Daniel 3:25), but He promises that when we come out of the fire we will not even smell of the fire that we walked through.
When we are walking through the fire, or the waves - it is then that Satan will do his best to make us feel alone, abandoned, and stinky. But it is then that we can hear the roar in the heavens as the space between wears thin. "And should I ever need reminding how good You've been to me I'll count the joy come every battle 'Cause I know that's where You'll be."
Count the joy in the battles... because that is where He is... walking with you in the fire, making it so that you don't even smell of smoke.
There's a grace when the heart is under fire
Another way when the walls are closing in
And when I look at the space between
Where I used to be and this reckoning
I know I will never be alone
There was another in the fire
Standing next to me
There was another in the waters
Holding back the seas
And should I ever need reminding
Of how I've been set free
There is a cross that bears the burden
Where another died for me
There is another in the fire
All my debt left for dead beneath the waters
I'm no longer a slave to my sin anymore
And should I fall in the space between
What remains of me and this reckoning
Either way I won't bow to the things of this world
And I know I will never be alone
There is another in the fire
Standing next to me
There is another in the waters
Holding back the seas
And should I ever need reminding
What power set me free
There is a grave that holds no body
And now that power lives in me
There is another in the fire, oh
There is another in the fire, whoa
There is another in the fire, whoa
There is another in the fire, oh
I can see
And I can see the light in the darkness
As the darkness bows to Him
I can hear the roar in the heavens
As the space between wears thin
I can feel the ground shake beneath us
As the prison walls cave in
Nothing stands between us
Nothing stands between us
There is no other name but the name that is Jesus
He who was and still is, and will be through it all
So come what may in the space between
All the things unseen and this reckoning
And I know I will never be alone
And I know I will never be alone
There'll be another in the fire
Standing next to me
There'll be another in the waters
Holding back the seas
And should I ever need reminding
How good You've been to me
I'll count the joy come every battle
'Cause I know that's where You'll be
I can see the light
And I can see the light in the darkness
As the darkness bows to Him
I can hear the roar in the heavens
As the space between wears thin
I can feel the ground shake beneath us
As the prison walls cave in
Nothing stands between us
Nothing stands between
There'll be another in the fire
Standing next to me
There'll be another in the waters
Holding back the seas
And should I ever need reminding
How good You've been to me
I'll count the joy come every battle
'Cause I know that's where You'll be
Count the joy come every battle
'Cause I know that's where You'll be
I'll count the joy come every battle
'Cause I know that's where You'll be, sing it again
I'll count the joy come every battle
'Cause I know that's where You'll be
I'll count the joy come every battle
'Cause I know that's where You'll be
I've heard the phrase "when it rains it pours" and often wondered about the justice of that. "Bad things come in threes," they say. And I wonder how a good, wonderful, and loving God could do that to people. "Kick me while I'm down." There are so many phrases that mean basically the same thing. When I'm in the fire already, why are you turning up the heat? Why are you hitting me then?
But let's think for just a moment about a different image... I have watched a blacksmith/farrier make horseshoes before... To make the shoe fit, first you heat it really hot. And then you put it on the anvil, and hit it, repeatedly while it is hot and pliable. And maybe then you put it back into the heat, to be ready to be hit again, to make it the perfect shape, to fit the horse perfectly, sometimes in a special way to correct something that is going wrong with a hoof, to heal a part that has been harmed, or to train a horse to walk in a certain way.
What if we realize that God isn't the fire, and he isn't the hammer - He's the anvil. He's not moving. You get put in the fire and beaten - but through the whole thing God is stationary - he's the anvil that is supporting you, shaping you... to fit perfectly into the spot He has for you. You may have been shaped perfectly to fit with a situation, formed in a way that will support someone else, or maybe even put there to challenge, or stretch someone so that they walk in a certain way.
"Let the pain press you into Jesus, He will carry you" - just as the anvil supports and forms the horseshoe, press into Him.
Jesse's words about his song: Life is full of pain and pressures. The source of our discomfort can come from many sources: the brokenness of the world, the enemy of our souls, the wrong choices we make, or even God's loving discipline. Regardless of the source of the pain, if we will allow the pressure to press us into Jesus he uses the pain to shape us and make us into who he wants us to be. Like a blacksmith forming metal against an anvil. It's not actually the hammer that forms the metal it's the strong, immovable anvil. God is like an anvil and though it may be painful, he lovingly shapes us. Luke 22:31-32 & Psalm 42
God he will not move
God he will not move
He bends and forms until his work is through
God he will not move
With every blow steadily he holds
God he will not move
God he will not move
Some have asked to harm you
But He has prayed for you
Let the pain press you into Jesus
He will carry you
Hold on, Hold on
God he will not move
God he will not move
He bends and forms until his work is through
God he will not move
With every blow steadily he holds
God he will not move
God he will not move
I know your heart is breaking
Take hope you weary soul
Your faith is almost failing
It’s as though you can’t take anymore
I don't actually have words to share. I just have this song today. Come close, Jesus.
You say You're near to the broken
You say Your peace passes understanding
You say You're hope for the hurting
Where are You now?
Come close, I'm on the verge of breaking
Come close, I'm desperate for Your presence
Come close, the weight of pain is crushing
Come close
She touched Your hem and You healed her
You opened eyes with the dirt we walk on
When will I wake from this nightmare
Where are You now?
Where are You now?
So come close, I'm on the verge of breaking
Come close, I'm desperate for Your presence
Come close, the weight of pain is crushing
Come close
You are good, You are good
I believe You are good
You are good, You are good
I still believe You are good
You are good, You are good
I believe You are good
You are good, You are good
I still believe You are good
So come close, I'm on the verge of breaking
Come close, I'm desperate for Your presence
Come close, the weight of pain is crushing
Come close
If You're not scared of my questions
Where are You now?
I love old hymns... I love the power behind the words, I love the structure of the music, I love the history. And when someone adds a fun bridge or chorus, I love it even more.
"Streams of mercy, Calvary's flood
Bound to Your heart through innocent blood
Come have Your way, we heed to your call
Praise to the sov'reign Lord of all"
This week I've been reading through 1 Corinthians, and I was struck by verse 7:23 - "God paid a high price for you, so don't be enslaved by the world." These streams of mercy - they are the high price that God has paid. That price binds us to Him - we are now His servants, bought by Calvary's flood. And just as a servant heeds to his master's call, we need to heed to His call.
"O to grace how great a debtor daily I'm constrained to be!
Let thy goodness like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee
Prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love
Here's my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above"
Here's my heart, take and seal it... bind it to thee, Lord. Bind it to thee.
Come thou fount of every blessing
Tune my heart to sing thy grace
Streams of mercy never ceasing
Call for songs of loudest praise
Teach me some melodious sonnet
Sung by flaming tongues above
Praise the mount I'm fixed upon it
Mount of thy redeeming love
Here I raise my Ebenezer
Here by thy great help I've come
And I hope by thy good pleasure
Safely to arrive at home
Jesus sought me when a stranger
Wondering from the fold of God
He, to rescue me from danger
Interposed His precious blood
O to grace how great a debtor daily I'm constrained to be!
Let thy goodness like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee
Prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love
Here's my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above
Streams of mercy, Calvary's flood
Bound to Your heart through innocent blood
Come have Your way, we heed to your call
Praise to the sov'reign Lord of all
O that day when freed from sinning,
I shall see Thy lovely face
Clothed then in blood washed linen
How I'll sing Thy sovereign grace
Come, my Lord, no longer tarry,
Take my ransomed soul away
Send thine angels now to carry
Me to realms of endless day.
I think it's really easy for me to think "I know you ask for all of me, God, but I'm just going to hold onto this one little piece" - whether that piece is something that I really like, or something that I am really ashamed of, or something that I just plain don't want to share. I do it with my kids: "God, you can have it all, but maybe not my kids... they're mine... I'm not sharing"... I do it with sins: "God, I know you can and have forgiven everything, but sometimes, I just need to feel the pain again, to wallow in that, to feel unforgivable and horrible and rotten"... I do with with my desires: "God, I know you want me to stop feeling this way, or doing this thing, but... It feels so good... and it makes me happy... you want me to be happy, right?"
"Everything's on the altar now
No holding back, no holding out
In view of your matchless sacrifice
Take every treasure, take this life"
But if I think about it - His sacrifice. It was everything. He gave it all. He gave up His desires. He gave up His plans. He gave up His selfishness. He gave up my sins.
If I am to really be like Jesus, I need to give it all up. ALL.
"Selfish ambition and my pride
I'm giving up, I'm letting die
In these empty hands I have it all, have it all
The pure joy of knowing You, my Lord"
In our empty hands, we are filled with His pure joy. We must be completely empty to be filled up with Him, in all situations.
"We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love." (Romans 5:3-5 NLT)
The trials and problems we run into help us see our blind sides. They help us see where we haven't yet surrendered everything. That doesn't mean they are fun, but they help us surrender - to help us develop the endurance needed to keep surrendering every day. To set us free - free to be filled with His love, which gives us hope.
"All that I am for all that You are, my Lord
All that I have for all that You are
You're the pearl beyond price, greater than life
All that I am for all that You are"
Everything's on the altar now
No holding back, no holding out
In view of your matchless sacrifice
Take every treasure, take this life
All that I am for all that You are, my Lord
All that I have for all that You are
You're the pearl beyond price, greater than life
All that I am for all that You are
Selfish ambition and my pride
I'm giving up, I'm letting die
In these empty hands I have it all, have it all
The pure joy of knowing You, my Lord
All that I am for all that You are, my Lord
All that I have for all that You are
You're the pearl beyond price, greater than life
All that I am for all that You are
It's only in surrender that I'm free
It's only in surrender that I'm truly free
It's only in surrender that I'm free
(All I am is Yours, my Lord)
It's only in surrender that I'm truly free
I am free. I am free indeed
I am free. I am free indeed
All that I am for all that You are, my Lord
All that I have for all that You are
You're the pearl beyond price, greater than life
All that I am for all that You are
How often do we find ourselves in these conversations?
But what does God call us into? Busy? or Peace? Tired? Or rested in Him?
What do you do with the time and space that God has given you? Do you linger in Him? Resting in His presence?
What will it be like when we see Him? Will we hear well done faithful servant?
I think I'll just linger
A little while longer
My flesh tries to flee
But my spirit pleads to stay
Your presence is peaceful
Your love's ever faithful
I'd ask for more years
But to You they appear just like a day
What will it be like when I see You
And all of Your glory and power
Will I hear
"Well done faithful servant
You treasured your hours."
Oh may I be found in Your presence
Paying no mind to my needs
Consumed by Your infinite wonder
Content at Your feet
I think I'll just linger
A little while longer
Oooh my flesh tries to flee
But my spirit pleads to stay
Your presence is peaceful
Your love's ever faithful
I'd ask for more years
But to you they appear just like a day
Oooh so I think I'll just linger
Oooh oh ooooh ooooh yeah
What will it be like when I see You
And all of Your glory and power
Will I hear
"Well done faithful servant
You treasured your hours.
My child did you linger
A little while longer?
Those good works and deeds are not what I need
I only want you."'
Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus
Just to take Him at His word
Oh, just to rest upon His promise
And to know this sayeth the Lord
Oh and Jesus, Jesus how I trust Him
How I've proved Him o'er and o'er
Oh and Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus
Oh for grace to trust Him more
Oh for grace to trust Him more
What gets you out of bed in the morning? What keeps you from hiding there?
Maybe, like me, you have had stretches of your life where you're not sure if you ever actually got out of bed. Maybe you have cried until you weren't sure you could ever cry any more tears, and then cried for hours more. Maybe you have shut down, shut out, numbed out, blocked out to the point where you simply sit and stare with unseeing eyes. Maybe you've been told that you just need to "get over it" or that there's "no reason to be upset". Maybe you believe that it is your fault. Maybe you believe that there is no way anyone could possibly love you or forgive what you have done.
"Out of the depths I cry to You, in darkest places I will call. Incline Your ear to me anew, and hear my cry for mercy Lord. Were You to count my sinful ways, how could I come before Your throne. Yet full forgiveness meets my gaze, I stand redeemed by grace alone."
How well I know the feelings; the depths of the pit. The self condemnation, the hatred. But He doesn't count your sinful ways. He meets our gaze with full forgiveness.
"So put Your hope in God alone, take courage in His power to save, completely and forever won, by Christ emerging from the grave."
We are fully and completely saved... that all who trust in Him find healing in His sacrifice.
When I'm stuck in bed. When my thoughts are stuck on negative repeat...
I will wait for You, I will wait for You
Through the storm and through the night
I will wait for You, surely wait for You
For Your love is my delight
I will wait for You, I will wait for You
On Your word I will rely
I will wait for You, surely wait for You
Till my soul is satisfied
Lean into His truth, found in His word, until your soul is satisfied.
Out of the depths I cry to You
In darkest places I will call
Incline Your ear to me anew
And hear my cry for mercy Lord
Were You to count my sinful ways
How could I come before Your throne
Yet full forgiveness meets my gaze
I stand redeemed by grace alone
I will wait for You, I will wait for You
On Your word I will rely
I will wait for You, surely wait for You
Till my soul is satisfied
So put Your hope in God alone
Take courage in His power to save
Completely and forever won
By Christ emerging from the grave
I will wait for You, I will wait for You
On Your word I will rely
I will wait for You, surely wait for You
Till my soul is satisfied, oh, ooh
Now He has come to make a way
And God Himself has paid the price
That all who trust in Him today
Find healing in His sacrifice
That all who trust in Him today
Find healing in His sacrifice
I will wait for You, I will wait for You
Through the storm and through the night
I will wait for You, surely wait for You
For Your love is my delight
Oh I will wait for You, I will wait for You
Through the storm and through the night
I will wait for You, surely wait for You
For Your love is my delight
I will wait for You, I will wait for You
Through the storm and through the night
I will wait for You, surely wait for You
For Your love is my delight, oh, ooh
Oh You are my delight
You're my delight
I will wait for You, I will wait for You
On Your word I will rely
I will wait for You, surely wait for You
Till my soul is satisfied
I will wait for You, I will wait for You
On Your word I will rely
I will wait for You, surely wait for You
Till my soul is satisfied
Sometimes a song gets stuck in my head because it's annoying (hello, VBS music). Sometimes a song gets stuck in my head because its sooooooo good. And sometimes a song just gets stuck because it's the message I need to hear on repeat all day. (That's not actually to say that those are mutually exclusive or that this is an exhaustive list, it's just that most of the time, it's one of those three things for me)
This song has been stuck in my head for roughly a month. It's not like I've really felt like I was going to fall off the deep end. I've actually felt fairly stable. But... and yes, there is a but... God has been steadily reminding me throughout the last few weeks just how much I need Him - even in the good times. For me when things are going well I think I tend to get lax. I get complacent. I think to myself, "I can totally do this." It's taken some pretty catastrophic things in my life to knock me down enough to get on my face before God to say "I need you". And God has been spending the last several months whispering to me... "it's ok you think you're ok... you still need me... and we can do this the easy way, or we can do this the hard way, your pick."
I have done a bunch of different Bible reading plans through the years. Currently I'm in the middle of two (one that is called #SamePageSummer - it's a cool one, check it out... for the record, if you want to be on the "same page" today is day 38 in YouVersion or you can click these for a more standard paper print out: guys or gals) reading plans. I just finished a different one that was reading through the old testament in a year.
What has struck me over and over and over throughout all of my different readings is this concept of forgiveness. And I think also how very messed up my view of forgiveness tends to be. God has been gently nudging me to leave my many misconceptions of forgiveness, or my imperfect applications of forgiveness to others or myself, to leave them for good, and to walk free in a sweet forgiven state.
"Come and listen, all you who fear God, and I will tell you what he did for me. For I cried out to him for help, praising him as I spoke. If I had not confessed the sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened. But God did listen! He paid attention to my prayer. Praise God, who did not ignore my prayer or withdraw his unfailing love from me."
Psalms 66:16-20 NLT
God listens, because we confess our sins - not because we are perfect! And not only is it not because we are perfect, we can't be perfect on our own! If we could, then there would be no reason for Jesus!!
"Yet we know that a person is made right with God by faith in Jesus Christ, not by obeying the law. And we have believed in Christ Jesus, so that we might be made right with God because of our faith in Christ, not because we have obeyed the law. For no one will ever be made right with God by obeying the law.” I do not treat the grace of God as meaningless.... For if keeping the law could make us right with God, then there was no need for Christ to die."
Galatians 2:16, 21 NLT
"Let me ask you this one question: Did you receive the Holy Spirit by obeying the law of Moses? Of course not! You received the Spirit because you believed the message you heard about Christ. How foolish can you be? After starting your new lives in the Spirit, why are you now trying to become perfect by your own human effort?"
Galatians 3:2-3 NLT
So - are you trying on your own? Or are you willing to confess "Lord I need you, oh I need you, every hour I need you" - because let me tell you - you can do it the easy way... or the hard way.
Lord, I come, I confess
Bowing here I find my rest
Without You I fall apart
You're the One that guides my heart
Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You
Where sin runs deep Your grace is more
Where grace is found is where You are
Where You are, Lord, I am free
Holiness is Christ in me
Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You
So teach my song to rise to You
When temptation comes my way
When I cannot stand I'll fall on You
Jesus, You're my hope and stay
Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You
You're my one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You
Who do you have in your life that will look you in the eye and see behind your facade? Do you have someone?
It is crucial that you have someone.
Who do you look in the eye? Who do you challenge? Who do you tell what they need to hear? How are you showing others that there is a God and that He is real?
Because here's a secret: WE ALL NEED TO HEAR THIS TRUTH! (I guess in all caps, now it isn't a secret anymore?)
I was blessed yesterday to meet with someone who has looked me in the eye since I was ten. For twenty nine years (I think as of next week??) this person has spoken truth to me. Reminded me that I was valuable when I was at my lowest, told me about Jesus when no-one else did. Reminded me that I could seek Him, and that He wouldn't leave me. She's been real (we've cried so many tears!!), she's been authentic, and she's asked hard questions. She has been the person God has used to save my life. She is not my savior. But she has pointed me at God consistently.
But a word of encouragement to you, if you are thinking "I couldn't possibly be that person" for someone else, have you seen my life, Wendy? I'm not perfect.
She's not perfect either! She's screwed up, too. And that's the awesome part - as our relationship has morphed over the years, we have been able to encourage each other! To pray for each other. To speak truth and love and be forgiven for our own faults... to be a witness and testimony to each other - demonstrating on earth what God does for us every day.
So... keep your eyes open: who is God putting in front of you? Who can you look in the eyes and take the time to tell what they need to hear? Who can you tell they're not forgotten?
Find someone today!
I am just like everyone
Jesus I need You, I need Your Love
To save my life
Tell me what I need to hear
Tell me that I’m not forgotten
Show me there’s a God
Who can be more than all I’ve ever wanted
‘Cause right now I need a little hope
I need to know that I’m not alone
Maybe God is calling you tonight
To tell me something
That might save my life
We’ve met half a dozen times
I know your name I know you don’t know mine
But I won’t hold that against you
You come here every Friday night
I take your order and try to be polite
And hide what I’ve been going through
If you looked me right in the eye
Would see the pain deep inside
Would you take the time to
Tell me what I need to hear
Tell me that I’m not forgotten
Show me there’s a God
Who can be more than all I’ve ever wanted
‘Cause right now I need a little hope
I need to know that I’m not alone
Maybe God is calling you tonight
To tell me something
That might save my life
I’m the pastor at your church
For all these years you’ve listened to my words
You think I know all the answers
But I’ve got doubts and questions too
Behind this smile I’m really just like you
Afraid and tired and insecure
If you look me right in the eye
Would you see the real me inside
Would you take the time to
Tell me what I need to hear
Tell me that I’m not forgotten
Show me there’s a God
Who can be more than all I’ve ever wanted
‘Cause right now I need a little hope
I need to know that I’m not alone
Maybe God is calling you tonight
To tell me something
That might save my life
Save my life
I am just like everyone
Jesus I need You, I need Your Love
To save my life
Tell me what I need to hear
Tell me that I’m not forgotten
Show me there’s a God
Who can be more than all I’ve ever wanted
‘Cause right now I need a little hope
I need to know that I’m not alone
Maybe God is calling you tonight
To tell me something
That might save my life
Have you ever heard a song that you are pretty sure was written about your life, but you don't even know the songwriter? That's definitely how I felt about this song this week when I heard it for the first time. There was this moment while listening that I had to check myself. Did I write this? Is she looking deep into my soul and just singing this song?
"For who will love her, if she doesn't shine?"
Anyone else out there feel like their worth and identity come from how others see them? That you have to look perfect to have value? To be lovable? That if people saw the cracks in you they would not find you worth being around? How hard have you worked to pull yourself out of that stuck place, only to find yourself more trapped than you were when you started?
I can't tell you how much of my life I have spent trying to make other people happy, to perform correctly so that I will be loved. My insatiable need to be needed has led me into so many horrible corners, so many places of depression.
I really like this song, because it is a good reminder of where I have been, but... I don't like that it doesn't offer an answer.
Because the reality is that you don't have to live in this place.
You are loved - no matter whether you shine or not.
So, I offer you this alternative final verse...
You see her sit alone
dwelling in guilt and shame
She turns to Your arms
Finds Your strength and no blame
Why did she wait so long?
"My child you are mine"
For you will love her
When she does not shine
You will love her
You will love her
You will love her
When she does not shine
She buries the problems
but they grow and bloom again
No one need see them
She will deftly pretend
Play her high cards
Best foot forward overtime
For who will love her
if she does not shine?
Hopelessness dogs her
but she will not give in
She will reason fear away again
A full and leaky vessel
She hides the cracks behind
For who will love her
if she does not shine?
Who will love her? Shining
Who will love her? Shining
Who will love her
If she does not shine?
She tries to pull herself
from difficult request
Works to be satisfied
with just doing her best
Till someone doubts her courage
and she struggles with resign
For who will love her
if she does not shine?
Who will love her? Shining
Who will love her? Shining
Who will love her
If she does not shine?
She tries to pull herself
from rejections debris
And the more she pulls
the less she seems to be free
When did this all begin?
Was there one point in time?
And who will love her
If she does not shine?
Who will love her? Shining
Who will love her? Shining
Who will love her
If she does not shine?
"You find me at my worst, but it never made you turn away, you look beyond my brokenness saying I am yours."
I have had many "worst" moments. Places where depression has sunk in, where I'm feeling shame. You know the place - the one where you feel completely unlovable, and possibly also feel unloved. The lonely moments, the places where you think you are completely without. Completely broken.
God says: "you are mine, I made you, and I love you - your brokenness doesn't make me turn away."
More than anything, what scares me is how very normal people can look when they are feeling their "worst". While some people are very clearly struggling, others can hide it so very well. I am struck by a conversation I had a couple days ago with a man who just lost his wife a few weeks ago. Looking at him, you wouldn't have known he had just bawled his eyes out, you wouldn't have known that he had spent the previous hour screaming at himself for how "stupid" he was. But a simple "How are you" and then showing I actually wanted the answer led to a good conversation of how he was really doing.
You never know who needs to hear the words "you are the rose from my garden, you are the lily that I have chosen." So watch around you. Speak life to those who need to hear truth. Love well. Remind people that they have value. Ask someone how they are doing, and stick around to hear the answer! And let's also remember that even when people aren't at their worst, they can always use encouragement.
And if you are struggling, please say something. Find the person who will ask "How are you?" and then stick around for the answer. And then, answer them truthfully!
I can't thank my friend enough for trusting me with his pain. I hope he felt loved by our quick conversation at the grocery store.
"I won't be the same again."
You find me at my worst
But it never made you turn away
You look beyond my brokenness
Saying I am yours
Take me as I am
Making me overwhelmed
You take delight in me
I won't be the same again
I am the rose from your garden
I am the lily that you've chosen
You are the light that bring me life
It is your love that makes me rise
I am the rose from your garden
I am the lily that you've chosen
You are the light that bring me life
It is your love that makes me rise
You keep my head held high
At the times I really want to cry
You give me strength and advice
Pick me up and i'm alive
I am the rose from your garden
I am the lily that you've chosen
You are the light that bring me life
It is your love that makes me rise
I am the rose from your garden
I am the lily that you've chosen
You are the light that bring me life
It is your love that makes me rise
your love that makes me rise
This love I can't hide it
This love I can't deny it
This love I can't contain
I am the rose from your garden
I am the lily that you've chosen
You are the light that bring me life
It is your love that makes me rise
I am the rose from your garden
I am the lily that you've chosen
You are the light that bring me life
It is your love that makes me rise
your love that makes me rise
Whose praise do you seek? Why do you do what you do? Are you seeking praise for your own accomplishments? Are you seeking your own glory and fame? Or are you looking for God to be glorified?
I have a love-hate relationship with this song. There's lots of reasons for that, but one is that I think I find it super convicting, but then also super exciting. "The earth will be filled with glory, like water o'er the sea, filled with glory" - there is a day coming where the earth will be filled with His glory!
"As we join as one, As we live to let Your kingdom come, Father, through our lives, We want to see You glorified"
That is my prayer - that first I would join with other believers in the One church, that I would live to let His kingdom come, and in that find urgency to share about Him, and that through my life I would show that I want Him to be glorified.
Glorify your name. God keep me humble. More of you, less of me.
As we all bow down
As we all come casting off our crowns
Would You hear our cry?
We want to see You glorified
As we all bow down
And as we all come casting off our crowns
Would You hear our cry?
We want to see You glorified
Glorify Your name
Glorify Your name
Glorify Your name
We want to see You glorified
As we join as one
As we live to let Your kingdom come
Father, through our lives
We want to see You glorified
Glorify Your name
Glorify Your name
Glorify Your name
We want to see You glorified
Glorify Your name
Glorify Your name
Glorify Your name
We want to see You glorified
The earth will be filled with glory
Like water o'er the sea, filled with glory
The earth will be filled with glory
Like water o'er the sea, filled with glory
The earth will be filled with glory
Like water o'er the sea
Glorify Your name
Glorify Your name
Glorify Your name
We want to see You glorified
Glorify Your name
Glorify Your name
Glorify Your name
We want to see You glorified
We want to see You glorified
Do you have people in your life who have seen you at your worst, seen you when you thought all hope was lost, but still stuck with you? What about seeing you at your best, when your best was still not enough? People who stick around and you don't know why, because you don't see the worth in you?
What about eternally? Do you believe God will do that for you? Do you believe Jesus sees through all your masks, past the "picture window" face you put on, to let people only see the good? Do you believe that He sees you in all of those places, and in a way that humans cannot still loves you?
A friend told me recently that it was really nice to be "known" - to have people know their story, to know their past and still want to be around them. To have them understand some of why they do what they do.
Friends, God knows you. You are known. And He can take your mess and make it something beautiful.
Jesus, please draw near. You know my heart tends to stray.
How does your heart stray? Do you long for things you can't have? Do you believe in the lies Satan tells you about who you are? Do you crave coping behaviors that you think serve you "well" but you know that really lead you to feel more empty?
Hear the truth: God is faithful, and He is good. Your heart, once stained by sin and shame, can be restored to innocence.
He offers a second (and third, and fourth, and fifth...) chance. Will you take it today?
You've seen me at my worst
When I thought all hope was lost
You've seen at my best
And still I've fallen short
What You see of worth in me
I will never know
I'll never know
I'm so thankful
That new mercies rise with the morning sun
I'm so thankful
That You've never given up on me
Please draw near
You know my heart it tends to stray
It tends to stray
Mystery of all mysteries
What You've done in my heart
Once stained by sin and shame
You've restored innocence
Why I have this second chance
I will never know
I'll never know
I'm so thankful
That new mercies rise with the morning sun
I'm so thankful
That You've never given up on me
Please draw near
You know my heart it tends to stray
It tends to stray
You must be greater
I must be less
You can take this mess
And make it beautiful
Make it new
Let this be my crossroads
Where faith and action meet
Where looking back at my past will prove
You are faithful God
And if I've learned one thing
I know that You are good
Yes, You are good
"Jesus you're the center, everything revolves around You."
I love astronomy. I love physics. I love how things interact together. I love that the earth and other planets revolve around the sun because of the MASS that is the sun. It's the magnitude of the star that controls the amount of gravity pulling things in - and the distance you are from the sun that controls that gravitational pull.
We serve a BIG God. A mighty, massive amazing Son. And that gravity keeps us revolving around Him - and the closer we draw to Him, the more we will be drawn in. So... keep Him at the center, and lean in - you'll find yourself sucked in even further, drawn to His gravity.
It's all about you, Jesus!
Jesus at the center of it all
Jesus at the center of it all
From beginning to the end
It will always be, it's always been You
Jesus, Jesus
Nothing else matters
Nothing in this world will do
'Cause Jesus You're the center
Everything revolves around You
Jesus You
At the center of it all
At the center of it all
Jesus be the center of my life
Jesus be the center of my life
From beginning to the end
It will always be, it's always been You
Jesus, Jesus
Nothing else matters
Nothing in this world will do
'Cause Jesus You're the center
Everything revolves around You
Jesus You
From my heart to the Heavens
Jesus be the center
It's all about You
Yes it's all about You
Jesus be the center of Your church
Jesus be the center of Your church
And every knee will bow
And every tongue shall confess You
Jesus, Jesus
Jesus, Jesus
Jesus, Jesus
Jesus, Jesus
From my heart to the Heavens
Jesus be the center
It's all about You
Yes it's all about You
